Rant, More Rant.

The Day I Turn 19, I'm Still 17!

2011-12-29T10:48:00.000+08:00

Setelah sekian lama tak bertapak.

Assalamualaikum W.B.T, Hello!

Last time aku berblog, seminggu yang lepas. Hmm, dalam masa seminggu macam-macam yang berlaku. One of them is "Happy Birthday Risha Nazneen!"

On 22nd going 23rd December, I sense some weirdness went on with my housemate Suaray Zupli. First, she went out of house with reason going to withdraw her money. Fine. That's not weird. But what's weird was after she came back from the ATM machine, she was still in her tudung. That's #WeirdPoint1. Plus, she didn't cook that night! I was hungry, so I ordered food to be delivered home. When I said I ordered food, she sorta give me this one "Oh, kau delivery makanan ke?". #WeirdPoint2. Then, I notice that she went in and out of Hanim's room (..still in her tudung..) I heard no laughter, I heard no talking but she's in Hanim's room, door closed. Entah apa-apa sahaja yang mereka buat dalam bilik tu. #WeirdPoint3. Earlier that afternoon also, Suraya cleaned the kitchen & living room. I was like, "WTF? Sue kemas rumah?" #WeirdPoint4. But I tried to reason that out with Sue's PMS-ing.

But, that night I was busy studying. I was finishing my PBL, going half crazy making notes on Pharmacology. So, all those #WeirdPoints, I didn't really pay any attention to them.

Then, until at one point suddenly Sue knocked my doors (...still in her tudung..) and told me that Baba's coming over to check lamp in Sue's room. She also said, that Baba wanted to check all of ours lamp. My first remark when Sue said that was, "ENGKAU KENAPA MASIH LAGI BERTUDUNG?" because seriously, that's like beyond weird. Then she rushed me saying Baba's coming over, pakai tudung and all. I looked around my room, dahlah bersepah. Cepat cepat campak apa yang patut.

Baru keluar bilik, tengok pintu bilik Hanim terbuka, but lampu tertutup, but there's like lights being lit up. I don't know what light. Baru nak jenguk, tiba-tiba, "Happy Birthday to you~~♬ Happy Birthday to you~~♬"

The day I turn 19, I'm 6 years old? Or 60? HMMMPH! Haha :D

Aku tak nangis tau. Tapi, aku terus cepat-cepat sorok belakang pintu bilik. Malu konon. Menyampah. Dahlah aku pakai tudung serabai serabai, diorang ambil video. Hampeh.

Di situ lah juga aku tahu kewujudan dua insan yang pernah kata yang mereka sangat lah sibuk with class and all, tapi tiba tiba muncul depan aku, seorang pegang cake, lagi seorang pegang camera. Ehem* Nado Thiraaaaa~!

So, it turns out that the evening they went straight to Mansoura after class and set up for the surprise birthday party. Terima kasih buat insan-insan yang membuat kejutan yang aku tak sangka-sangka kan ni.

Nadia Shahira Azmi, Atiqah Athirah, Suraya Zupli, Zaidatul Hanim, Alifah Liyana & Fatin Nadrah Hanim

❤❤❤

Terima kasih, thank you girls.

As a gift, they bought me a purse (because Nado said I'm in need of a new one..). Haha, thank you.

A video obba made, practically a vain video of herself saying I was born in the zoo, staying in the same cage with her Bebopp. Hahaha :D Also, a repetitive sentence of "Thank you for being my friend, thank you for being my friend". Hahaha :D She doesn't like people mimicking her videos & tweets. Puahaha :D

Then, obba & Thira stay over in Mansoura for few days with intention to watch our volleyball match, but she couldn't because there was some problem wth the volleyball event management. *sigh*

Anyways thank you Nado & Thirah for coming and celebrating my birthday here. Many thanks to my housemates as well, Sue & Hanim togetehr with Aye & Fatin kerana bersubahat. Hahaha :D

Thank you very much.

P/S : I'm still 17 years old. Thank you.

Kadang-Kadang, Bila Hati Dah Kuat Pun...

2011-12-20T02:00:00.000+08:00

You guys are always online. You guys are always available, online. But, I wonder why you never bother to ask me "How are you?", "How's your day?" or at least ask me "How am I doing?"

I know that you guys are always online.

You always reply to others. But why not me?

Is it because you think I don't need you guys? Is it because I rarely call? I rarely message?

Is it because you think that I'm strong enough to be on my own? I admit, I can be on my own but wouldn't it be nice if you'll be there when I don't need to ask you to be there for me?

I know I'm independent enough to be on my own, but at times I need you here by my side.

I miss the old us. I miss the time where you would suddenly be there for me when I was feeling down, then you would ask, "How are you?" I could only reply in tears because though I didn't say "I'm not okay", you know I'm not okay. It's like what you said, it's the same blood that run through our flesh. At times, you'll know that I'm not okay no matter how far we are. But I wonder, are those feelings gone already? I mean, now, I'm not okay. But I think waiting for you to suddenly send me a message or call me, is disappointing. It won't happen again, is it?

I miss the time where we'll keep on contacting. But now, not anymore. Why?

I'm not okay, parents. Your daughter's not okay. She needs you, but she couldn't said it.

She tried to, but she can't.

I'm having such a hard time now. I'm so busy with studies, I'm tired. When I have good news, I don't even know on who to tell. I made it into the Volley team, I'm so proud of myself and I want to tell you that. I want to share it with you and I want you to feel proud of me. You know I'm the least better in sports among us siblings, so now that I've found something I'm better at, I want you to feel proud of me. For you to be there when I'm having my match is too much to ask for, so I just want you to feel proud of me.

I just need your support. I need your support. One question kept on lingering on my mind. Why we least contacting these days? Sometimes, I blame myself.

Like before, I always say, absence makes the heart grows fonder. Before, it does. But, why not anymore? Have you forgotten about me?

If you think I'm already strong enough, independent to go through everything on my own, you're right. But at times, I still need you. I still need you.

Aku tak kuat sebenarnya.

Kadang-kadang aku berterima kasih dekat kawan kawan kat sini yang sanggup layan kerenah aku, sedikit terhibur hati ini, walaupun deep inside selalu aku terfikirkan keluarga.

Sigh. I can't afford to think of things like this now. I have so much in my mind. Thesis, PBL, Final exams, upcoming tournament, I just need your support. Thank you.

Quite Disappointing.

2011-12-12T12:24:00.000+08:00

Been busy with volleyball practice, thesis, studies, & sleep. Bleh.

Anyways, the volleyball tournament is postponed to this 16th December, which makes us having more time to practice for the upcoming tournament. It's all good though except for at time I strain myself to much with the practice, and the next day I'll have muscle pain everywhere.

2 days back, I had night practice. The fact that on the next day I'll be having PBL 2, where we would have to present our objectives, I haven't even finish studying but I was determined to wake early before going to PBL to revise things up. I showered right after practice session, around midnight and went straight for bed.

I was determined to wake up early, setting the alarm at 3AM. However, I can't even wake up. I kept on snoozing the alarm and one point I realized it was already 6AM. I tried to wake up and get off my bed, seriously, I can't. I CAN'T EVEN MOVE A MUSCLE. Yeah, right. I was having muscle pain everywhere. My abdomen muscle was stiff. My back was in pain. Oh My God. I can't even move a muscle, then I decided to skip PBL.

It was sooo painful I had to crawl down my bed to reach my phone, and laptop. My goodness.

Still, I can't just stay in bed, so I gather up all the courage and tried to stretch every muscle. Then, had a nice hot bath, and everything starting to get better.

Well, that's not the end of it.

Today, I'll be having PBL again, to open new case, Case 8. Last night I slept pretty late, unintentionally. At the same time Aye was asking me to help me download some files & put it in the flash drive, then in the morning she would come over at my place and print her stuff etc. The fact that it was that important she kept on reminding me to not wake up late when she's over at my place. It's because she has to present her objectives this morning.

This morning, I realized the alarm ringing at 6AM, but I kept on snoozing until 7AM. I was already awake, but I can't just wake up. My goodness.

Then, suddenly Sue woke me up at 10AM. I WAS LIKE, "WTF?", and I wonder why I didn't get any calls from Aye? Checking my phone again, I realized that my phone's battery was dead. Astaghfirullah-al azim. It struck me bad like a whip on my head, and I started to feel guilty to Aye. I could imagine, that this is soo important to Aye that she asked for my help, but I just slept away~

I feel so guilty tried to call her but memanglah kannnn phone takda credit. Haiya.

So, I kept on posting on her wall, but she didn't reply. Usually she'll reply because she's using BB, so internet on the go lah kan. Maybe dia marah? Yelah, dia dah minta tolong, phone aku pulak boleh habis battery time tu. Kalau aku pun, aku mengamuk.

Entahlah. Aku jarang rasa bersalah dengan orang. Tapi kali ini, aku rasa sangat bersalah. Sangat. Sama rasa bersalahnya bila aku rosakkan phone aku earlier this year. Phone, hadiah from Mama & Ayah before I fly to Egypt. Rasa bersalah sampai menangis tak henti-henti.

To Aye :

"Aye, if you're reading this, please. I feel so guilty for not picking up the phone & not waking up at that 6AM when I kept on snoozing the phone. I know this is important to you because you need to present your case today since you had postpone your objectives to today. I'm so sorry. Aku nak call kau as soon as aku bangun tapi aku takda credit ;___________; I'm so sorry Aye! Sorry sangat kalau aku susahkan kau pagi tadi. Sorry sangat kalau hari ni kau tak dapat present objectives kau. I'm so sorry Aye. So sorry. Tell me, how should I make it up? "

P/S : Tak pulak aku soalkan ketidak-hadiranku ke PBL pagi ini. Tak senonoh betul kau ni Risha. Tak senonoh.

Be Careful With What You Wish For.

2011-12-05T20:42:00.001+08:00

1. Hello Mr.Busy

I realized that for the last few weeks, Timah hasn't tweet a lot, I assumed she's busy with class & assignments and all. As for me, I wonder why was I not busy? I mean, people started to question me, "Hey? Is Medic that easy? I mean, I see you online 24/7".

Okay. To be frank, I'm supposed to be busy with studies and all but procrastination (..always..) ensues. Medical student should always study every day, at least memorize on Anatomy etc etc. But, I'm one lazy person. I like to procrastinate, A LOT. Also, I'm a last minute person. Though how bad I'm trying to change this bad habit, but I....just....can't.

Deep down, I actually envy Timah for being super busy. I mean, at least she looks like she's a student.

But, I should always remind myself. Be careful of what you wish for. Now, my schedule is quite packed, I have to juggle my time for studying, volleyball, chores, PBL, aktiviti melagha (..perlu dikurangkan, take note).

Tulah kau, nak sangat busy kan? Hah, amik kau. After class, terus kena pergi volley. Balik rumah kena study straight, kena tidur awal, bangun pagi lagi.

Padan muka.

2. Hello Mr. Cardiac

Hello Week 7 of Mansoura-Manchester Medical Programme! Thanks for the Cardiac case this week. This week's case, Case 7 : A downward Slope is related to cardiac. To be frank, I'm not so fond of this topic actually. There's two topic that I think I pretty weak at. Cardiac & Neuro.

So, here we go. This week's case a toughie. Plus, the lecture's a little hard today. Bleh.

3. Hello Mr.Volley

Also, I haven't mention this before here, that I'm joining the volleyball tournament again this year. So, every evening, I would have to attend 2 hours practice at the stadium.

As for this year, kureng mendapat sambutan dalam kalangan student Malaysia, so ended up the organizer decided on allowing female Egyptian team to join the tournament. So, knowing my weakness in certain part of volleyball, I really have to double the effort. I mean, I don't want being the only one yang "slacking" in the team. Yeah, I admit at times when I'm under pressure, I started to be clumsy and all.

Our team this year, Aces consist of myself, Miya, Hush, Ezzati, Israr, Laili & Thirah.

Get our head in the game, and let's win this Aces! Amin :)

4. Hello Mr. Thesis

Last but not least, I have a thesis needed to be handed in by the end of December. THIS IS UNFFFFFF. I haven't even start a thing, I haven't even decided on a topic. Damn.

I need to get my hands on the thesis ASAP.

Yang ini pun, padan muka kau. Siapa suruh bertangguh buat kerja itu?

5. Hello Mr.......FINAL EXAM?

Earlier today Dr.Nisreen said that final exam will be from 23rd January to 25th January. DANGGGGGG. Straight, tiada selang hari kot. Revision week kena habis study semua, makcik!

O.O

P/S : Sesungguhnya, this post has been drafted for 5 days -.-' Nampak sangat aku tiada masa untuk blogging dah. I can only rant on twitter these days. Bleh.

2 Events. Enough.

2011-11-29T21:34:00.000+08:00

1. Mid-Semester Examination

This is a late post. I know. I should have posted the day I finish with the exams and all but I was "busy" with revenge on my sleep time. Heeheee. Anyways, I've finished the 1-hour-50-MCQ-mid-semester-examination. After all those one week. revision week. Truth to be told, I don't feel 100% prepared when I entered the exam hall. I don't feel confident with Anatomy. At all.

After done with exam, lepak at Nadi Nil.

But, the results came out earlier today. My results was blehh. It was so-so, just middle average. It may not be the best because rest of my colleague got better results, but I tried to silently console myself that this exam is just Mid-Semester, and I would have to strive harder for finals later.

Ayman was there when I check the result & he said, "It's okay. Your mark is not the lowest. There are people who got 5.5 over 25 marks. See you're not the lowest?".

That's not the point. I'm not here to compete to surpass the lowest marks! No. That hurt my pride a little.

I would have to start on my Thesis & study for finals starting from now on, so that during the long 2 weeks revision week, I would only have to revise again & again & again.

That's my target now.

2. Blood Bank

Ah, earlier today, we went for practical session at the University's Hospital's Blood Bank. I don't even know where I got all those courage to wake up early though it's a good day to sleep in.

Maybe it's because I've promised Aye that I will tag along this morning.

To be frank, I kind of like this week's case! It's about Blood Disease. It's on.....blood.

It was hard at first to find the Blood Bank this morning for since that was the first time we had practical sessions at the Blood Bank.

So, first we had lectures, explaining on blood donation. On the person's criteria to qualify to donate blood, yada yada yada. Then, we were brought to the Path Lab, and the Professor explain on the blood grouping & rhesus. Also, since there were not many of us, so all of us got the chance to check our blood grouping.

I pricked myself. SUICIDAAAAL. Puahahaa :D

To be frank, I know what's my blood grouping already, for since both my parents are B+ , so that makes & my brothers B+ as well. Well, I was certain about that but I just go on with the prick test to confirm everything up.

Then,

VERIFIED : I'm a B+!

Itu sahaja kot. Sekian.

Mohon Restu.

2011-11-27T05:54:00.000+08:00

Hi.

Saya exam Mid-Semester hari ini dalam 3 jam lagi.

Doakan saya dapat jawab dengan baik, insyaAllah lancar segalanya.

Sekian terima kasih.

P/S : Cuak.

Berdebat Dengan Diri.

2011-11-26T19:00:00.000+08:00

Entah kenapa aku terpanggil untuk tulis pasal ini. Padahal, boleh sahaja aku sambung belajar, boleh sahaja aku ulangkaji Case untuk exam esok hari. Boleh sahaja aku tunda kerja memblog ini. Boleh sahaja.

Tetapi, jiwa aku terasa terganggu hari ini. Sangat kacau.

Tentang aku, aku selalu berfikir. Aku tak ada kuasa langsung untuk menguasai pemikiran sendiri. Kadang - kadang aku suka perasaan hanyut dalam pemikiran ini. Aku suka. Ianya umpama pemikiran kau menguasai tingkah laku kau. Dalam keadaan ini, adalah lebih baik jika aku bersendirian.

Tetapi, hari ini bukan hari untuk aku hanyut dalam pemikiran. Bukan masanya. Awal pagi, aku masih lagi fokus dalam ulangkaji. Tetapi menjelang petang, aku mula hanyut dalam pemikiran aku sendiri.

Terus terang aku katakan. Aku tak serapat dengan ibu bapa aku seperti orang lain. Kadang-kadang aku cemburu, tetapi aku kuatkan hati, semangat aku dengan mempercayai, "Ada makna disebalik semua ini".

Bagi rakan-rakan yang duduk di negara orang, aku ada soalan. Kerap manakah kau bercakap dengan ibu bapa kau? Kerap manakah kau Skype/YM/telefon ibu bapa kau? Hari - hari? Selang dua tiga hari? Tahniah. Aku gembira dengan kau semua.

Aku, the last time aku bercakap-cakap dengan ibu bapa aku, hari aku balik ke Egypt, di airport, hampir 3 bulan yang lalu. Kami cuma berhubung melalui FB message. Itu sahaja. Benda-benda penting sahaja.

Terus terang juga aku katakan, aku jenis yang keras hati. Maksud aku, aku kurang affection . Bukan kurang kasih sayang, tapi aku tak pandai ekspres perasaan aku. Aku tak pandai.

Pada masa yang sama, aku rasa Mama aku pun kurang affection dengan aku. Aku dan Mama jarang berpelukan seperti seorang mak & anak. Aku tak boleh katakan, "Ma, Sha sayang Mama" depan muka Mama sendiri. Aku tak boleh. Aku tak tau. Tipulah kalau aku cakap aku tak pernah cakap, "I love you", "Sha sayang Mama" dekat mak aku. Pernah. Tapi itu semua, sama ada di atas kad Happy Birthday, atau sekadar luahan di bibir.

Entahlah.

Sesetangah orang mungkin akan kata, "Mengalahlah. Cuba kau call mak bapak kau dulu. Cuba kau yang approach dulu". Aku pernah cuba, tapi tak berjaya.

Entahlah.

Aku cuma rindu Mama & Ayah, Itu sahaja, tapi aku malu untuk mengaku dengan mereka. Aku malu. Aku rasa, segan.

Entahlah.

Kadang-kadang, aku cuba padamkan segala benda yang berciri-ciri kekeluargaan bila aku kat Mesir ni. Sebab aku tahu, aku lemah dalam bab ini. Sangat lemah. Aku pun kadang-kadang wonder. Rindu tak mereka dekat aku? Mungkin sebab mereka tak pernah kata mereka rindu aku, aku pun tak pernah luaahkan segalanya.

Satu lagi, mungkin aku nak sangat tunjukkan dekat mereka yang aku ni semangat kental. Semangat kental, as in, aku tak pernah rindu mereka, aku tak pernah rasa homesick, tak pernah rasa mental breakdown sebab ketiadaan mereka. Aku taknak mereka rasa risau tengok aku rasa sedih dekat sini.

Entahlah.

Memang, aku pendam semuanya. Aku pendam semuanya.

Entahlah.

Aku, nampak kuat. Tetapi sebenarnya aku tidak. Aku lemah.
Aku nampak sihat. Tetapi sebenarnya tidak. Dari segi mental & rohani, aku kurang sihat.

Sudah.

Esok nak exam, jiwa aku serabut di saat terakhir.
Benci.

This Is Not A Post On Lionel Messi.

2011-11-26T01:47:00.000+08:00

Assalamualaikum W.B.T.

Hello! Haven't posted in days. Been busy with revision week, study study study, die.
Stealing my sleep time now just for the sake of wanting to post something. Bleh.

Mid-semester is the day after tomorrow. Down with 4 cases, still have one more case to cover + Anatomy and revise more Pharmacology. I agree with this :

Why there's so many drugs to be remembered? Streptomycin lah, Vancomycin lah, Albuterol lah, Rifampin lah. Blah blah blah. Wouldn't it be super OHSEM when there's one drug to cure every disease in this world? But, sad to say, it is not that easy. Well, at least, that why the profession of Pharmacist exist? They make a living, this way.

Hmm, 2 days to exam, I don't feel rushed like before. Partly maybe because I make my study plan, continuously keep things organize etc. I don't even know why I never thought of this before, maybe senses hadn't kick in back in the days. I realized that I'll would be having one hectic life each time my room is messy.

MESSY

not Lionel Messi.

Take note, I'm so messy that it takes more time for me to clean my room than messing them up again. I used to hate having made up bed. I used to go with,

"What's the point of making up your bed when then you'll jump on your bed again, mess them up?",

So, usually at home in Malaysia, Ma always babbling to me to always make my bed.

But, once I'm here (especially during this revision week), I always remind myself to make up my bed. Suddenly, it looks nice seeing a made up bed. Haha.

Persetankan kalau kau nak kata,

"Apa punya anak dara, katil pun tak kemas".

Hah, I'm gonna answer you with,

"I'm not your average anak dara".

Senang katalah kan, bila bilik kemas, kepala otak tak bertambah semak. Yalah, kepala dah semak study, dah semak menghafal itu ini, tak ke penat otak itu lihat katil tak berkemas, bilik bersepah, baju berlonggok. Penat si Otak hantar stimulus,

"AKU SEMAK TENGOK BILIK KAU. SAKIT. AKU SAKIT".

Otak pun tahu bercakap tau. Otak aku lah. Otak kau boleh?

.................

Dah start merepek, meraban. Sekian sahaja untuk kali ini. I need to go to bed nao!

P/S : Tsk, maybe the clean room won't stay long. Once messy, forever messy.

Today, Today, Today!

2011-11-20T22:25:00.000+08:00

This is very random of me. To post on what happened today on blog. Usually, I write something daily basis on Twitter but I feel like writing in today, *shrugs*.

1. Is Dr.Nisreen attending today's PBL?

Since last week, I still didn't know who would attend today's PBL session. Would be Dr.Nisreen or Dr.Suhaylah. Well, maybe I've never mentioned this before but Dr.Nisreen Mansour was not available for 2 weeks as she went to Manchester for some administration trip or something.

So, for Case 4 & Case 5, we had been with Dr.Suhaylah. Sessions with her was a little more relaxing than with Dr.Nisreen. Tetapi, manusia kadang kadang tak tahu bersyukur. When we was with Dr.Suhaylah, I studied 30% less than when I was with Dr.Nisreen.

Before Dr. Nisreen went, she told us that she wouldn't be available with for 3 weeks. So, calculation ensues & supposedly she would be back today.

Awesomely, definitely, *sigh*, last night I stayed up studying to prepare going for PBL this morning. In the morning, woke up slightly late, I still feel unprepared for today's case.

Then, I still went for PBL with heavy heart (..at the same time I still prayed that Dr.Nisreen will be jet-lagged and she won't come in today, instead, Dr. Suhaylah would come in again...).

So, I came in early for PBL, then Dr.Suhaylah came in. One word, "Alhamdulillah".

So, everything went okay.

2. ~~Ahmed Kamal's~~ Dish Party!

Last week during the opening of Case 5, Ahmed proposed for us to do some dish party. It was just a proposal but then almost everyone agree. To be frank, until last night I still don't know what food to bring. So, last night, rolling on Sue's carpet feeling stressed out thinking what should I bring for today's dish party.

End up, I just brought fruits. Terpaksalah get dressed segala bagai, went out to buy fruits. Sumpah malas.

So, today we did the makan-makan at the PBL room after the student presentations session. Lina brought spaghetti, Yun & Nad brought brownies. Nadia brought Tiramisu, Ainal brought Agar-Agar, Ahmed bought these mini cakes from Baron while Haziq & Hush brought drinks. Enough to stuff our stomach for the lunch!

Lina's spaghetti was YUM! YUM! YUM!

3. Boys Also Watch Korean Variety Show & ...We Got Married?

There's this boy in our group. I never heard him talk -.-' in our PBL session. He always get away from being questioned by Dr. Nisreen & Dr.Suhaylah (..jealous okay?). The name's Haziq (..Haha, nama Ejiq!)

So, we teased him saying like during PBL, we never heard him talk. But when he's in front of food, he speak out! Haha :D

Then, I got to learn that he watched Running Man, WGM etc. etc. That got me, *jaw drop*.

Ah, lelaki pun layan Korea ke? But it's no surprise though. Hallyu Virus is spreading madly. Mansoura is a Glory Hole of Boredom so this is a place where people start doing what they never thought they would start be doing. For example, like watching all those Korean Drama & Shows (..yelah, especially during winter yang sebati dengan saratoga ni kannn? Haha :D ), baking, bertukang etc.

Ah, after exam, maybe I'll take some of the things from him. Hehe.

4. Hush & I, Why We Always Talk About Food?

One of the few person whom I feel comfortable making ugly faces with; Haha :D

So, on the way back, Hush & I walk back. We had this talk. About...food. I think I need to start naming Hush - FOOD WARRIOR! Haha. She always have this expression of "OH-GOD-FOOOD-SO-YUMMEHH-OKAY-I'M-TREMBLING-NOW-THAT-FOOD-IS-YUMMEH-OH-YUMMEH" when there's food in front of her. Tapi yang bestnya, badan Hush kecik je, tak gemuk gemuk pun. (..okay, jealous.)

But it's not all bad when she's all glutton over food. I sometimes get good recommendations of food from her as well! Haha :D She knows a lot of good places to eat. NOM NOM NOM.

Since Hush at times stayed in Ulu Tiram, so we talked about all those pasar malam, bazar Ramadhan, Restoran Osman's Penang Char Kueh Tiau, tauhu bakar Warung Saga, Satay Wak Radol, Kacang Pool Balai Bomba, ABC Kampung Melayu.

Ah, though we had lunch earlier with those PBL-mates before, I was practically salivating thinking of them food. I love Malaysia. I love the food.

My God, teringat dekat Touch Down Malaysia after OPS Piramid last February. I was practically on a food hunt when I got back.

WARNING! You'll drool like real mad when you scroll down.
This only apply for fellow Food Warriors !

Okay, cukup. Batal puasa orang yang berpuasa.

5 . Hello, Revision Week! Be Nice!

It's official. Tomorrow I got no class already as revision week has started! So, I got 5 cases to study, cramp everything up in my brain, then the question will be in MCQ form. 50 MCQ Qs. Awesome kan?

I already start with Case 5 since it's the latest case & they are still fresh in mind. So, need to work with the rest.

Some people might go with, "What's up with you? All work up for mid semester exam where the mark taken for finals will be only 5%?" To answer you, "The world I am in now is very competitive, and I can't help myself being competitive as well! Also, being the stupidest among others hurt my pride so much".

So, I'm gonna study hard for this, and strive hard for this!

Except for, I still haven't find my study muses ;_______;

GO GO RISHA !

P/S : Easily motivated, but easily distracted halfway through. Give me strength.

Desire To Travel.

2011-11-20T22:19:00.000+08:00

Hello. I've been busy. But, thank goodness I'm still sane & healthy.

On life, hmm. Studies are going well. I mean, I can't really avoid procrastination at times. So, there are times where I fall of track of my study schedule. I seriously need to hide all videos, and ze broadband if that's the only way to get me concentrate on studying.

Anyways, my mid semester exam is in a week. Tomorrow's my last day of PBL before I start my 4 days of revision week (?). So, I'm stealing my PBL-revising time now to post this.

I think a lot. Like real lot. But recently there's this one thing I kept on thinking again & again.

I WANT TO TRAVEL.

I seriously want to go travel. If I'm seriously not in my right mind now, I would ditch all my studies, and go travel around the world.

Sadly, I'm sane enough. Plus, financially, I'm still not stable yet. I haven't have my own income yet. Sobs.

There are few places that I want to go.

Though I'm a Malaysian, sadly, I haven't even finish covering all parts of Malaysia. I haven't got the chance to fully explore to Kedah, Penang, Perak, Terengganu, Kelantan, Sabah & Sarawak.

To explore all those beautiful islands in Malaysia is one of my dreams. If I have the chance, I would like to hike mountains in Malaysia as well.

Too bad, I want to travel, but my Geography sucks. So my knowledge on all those islands & mountains are very limited.

When I was a kid, I used to travel a lot with my family. In a year, we would travel at least twice. Maybe my parents know are at the age of "I prefer relaxing kind of holidays & travelling", so I haven't got the chance to travel like how we used to.

My favourite concept of travelling is backpacking. We once went backpacking to Kelantan & Sabah. It was awesome. But I guess that was the last time for my parents partly because it was a little bit tiring for them. *sigh*

I miss travelling.

When now I'm in Egypt, there are many places of interest as well. Aswan, Luxor, Hurghada, Sharm El-Sheikh, Dahab etc. I haven't got the chance to go to any of the places yet, because of course, no money no talk.

So, in my mind now, I've been thinking over & over again over few things.

I'm going to plan for a backpacking trip in Malaysia on Summer 2012. Possibly, God willing, from Selatan - Utara. If it's too much, I don't mind if it's just a backpacking up at the north or something.
One day, I'll step my foot to all those places in Egypt.
Also, I'm hoping for travelling to Istanbul or Jordan.
Lastly, Europe Trip.

Actually, if I'm lacking with sense, I would just simply asked money from my parents, "Ayah, Ma, Can I have some money? I want to go travelling". But, I wasn't raised such ways. I don't ask if it's not necessary, and I rather work for it, or I called it, "Earn it with own hardwork".

As ambitious as this sound, all those travelling, I want to use my own money. Such pride I have.

Too bad, like I said, I have no income now as I'm still studying.

So, the best way to collect them bit by bit.

GAH. I WANT TO GO TRAVELLING.

P/S : I'm reserving Seoul as well. I'm still not ready to go to Seoul for now. Not at this age. I don't even know why.

No More Potato Couch!

2011-11-14T04:18:00.001+08:00

Almost 11PM, blogging in. I just revised my PBL case for tomorrow. Here we go, case 5! Well, Eid Adha hols ends tonight & hello again student life. I had enough of lazying around. I seriously thought of studying for Mid Semester which will be in 2 weeks but hampeh. Bermalas-malasan sahaja for the whole 2 weeks.

Well, don't worry. I will say those "I regret for not studying earlier" sentence soon. *sigh*

ㅜ.ㅜ

Also, it is still early, I know but Ma messaged me earlier asking me about my summer holidays. She asked because she wants to book the flight ticket now. I told her it's still early and I don;t even know when my holiday start. Haiya.

Haha, tapi itu maksudnya Mama dah bagi green light untuk balik Malaysia next year! Heeeee :D But she said, if I want to go home next year, I need to leave my laptop in Egypt. Hahhh, no wayyyyy!

Ahh, also, I went out just now then suddenly it rain! It was drizzling, the road has started to get muddy on road, blehhh. The boots are out of the bag, trench coat's out! Officially, it's winter (..and I'm still wearing less clothes at home -.-').

Alright, bed we go. I got an early morning, tomorrow! Tootles ;)

P/S : Craving for Sashimi ;__________;

I will hunt for this next year when I came back!

Salam Eid Adha ;

2011-11-11T05:34:00.000+08:00

Assalamualaikum. Hello, earthlings! 잘지냈어? Hope everyone's mighty fine! Also, I hope it's not to late, but Happy Eid Adha to all Muslims! I celebrated my Eid in Alexandria with Dodo, Thira, Mira & Mun together with Suee.

It was my 2nd time clebrating Eid Adha here in Egypt. I could say, with Egyptians yang "meriah" when it comes to celebrating Eid Adha (..compare to Malaysia), I started to appreciate Eid Adha more. Like last year, Eid Adha was blehh. Because it was our first year, and we didn't know everything. So, while everyone was busy with the Qurban, all of us slept til late noon though there were people walking in & out of our houses using our place for Qurban.

Hmm, this year, early in the morning, we went o MARA Building for Eid Adha prayers. It's the first! Hmm, tak senonoh kan?

*blur kejap*

Okay, tak tau nak type apa.

Hmm, the fact that I'll be having my mid semester examination in 3 weeks, I don't know. I still lazying around, not studying. Hmm, my plan earlier was to study but now, blehh. Thesis, satu benda tak buat lagi. I should get my hands on those things. Study & Thesis. Buat kerja last minute, tak guna. Nanti terkocoh-kocoh, padan muka.

Ah yes, just now I bought this :

Comel sangat kambing biri-biri mbek mbekk ni, rasa nak pijak pijak je.

Winter's here, sejuk ya amat. I feel like staying under my covers all day long! Makan pun. Asyik lapar je sekarang ni. Berat pun, of course. Dah naik. I have to get back to exercising. Seriously.

Okay, tootles.

Constipation of The Mind.

2011-11-04T10:18:00.001+08:00

I'm just, complicated.
Inside me, there's one complicated world.

I have so many things irrelevant on my mind,
I think too much.

I'm not carefree about life.
I have so many restrictions in life.
Like I said, I have so many things in mind.

I think too much,
That's why this post exist.
I just, need to get all of this out.

Damn, metaphorically, this is like constipation.
A constipation of mind.
I can't get everything off my mind.
I should, rest.

P/S : Absurdity ensues.

My Blood, For You.

2011-11-03T08:21:00.001+08:00

This is a few days old story. Since Eid Adha holiday has started, I've delayed the process of making a post on this. Bleh. Now, I'm forcing myself, in the middle of the night trying to finish this post. I would like to remember the first day I did this, so that's why I'm writing this.

Anyways, there's one thing I would like to do through out my life ever since I knew what's my blood type, and I knew that my blood is the 2nd least common among human populations.

DONATING BLOOD!

However, there was something that stopped me from doing so. At first I thought that when you're not having regular menstruation, you are not qualified to donate blood. Well, it is just until recently that I found out that you can still donate blood if your menstruation is not regular. So, it is just until recently I started to ask people around on where to donate blood. Before, I noticed that there are always blood drive van in our university, but at that time my communicating skills sucks arse & I was not confident of the hygiene of it.

I've thought of looking for "decent" place to donate my blood. I asked around, and from a friend, Erin she told me that she went donating blood at the University's hospital. She mentioned on bringing me the next time she's going which is around November.

Not until one day, walking back after class, I saw the blood drive van again in front of the Faculty of Pharmacy. But since on that day I was on my meds and daily supplements, so I postponed to do so. Well, tak sabar punya pasal though I've said I'll tag along with Erin, later.

On the next day, I knew that van will be in front of Gala' Street and I made my way there with Aye, Ainal & Batt. At first, Aye & I decided to donate blood while Ainal & Batt just accompanying us.

Thank God, our Arabic sucks less, so the history taking was a little bit difficult since the doctor in charge was not very fluent in English, but we made it. We filled in the forms, asking about our health, address, phone number etc. We chatted a little with the doctor & pathology lab technician, they were telling that not much Malaysian came to donate blood at their blood drive van.

Then, first thing, they checked my hemoglobin (Hb) level. I gotta say, the people really know how to distract you & at the same time prick your fingers with the lancet! I was being distracted with all the questions the doctor asked me while the path lab techie prick my finger with the lancet.Being distracted, when the reading of my Hb level was measured, the technician then blurted out, "Masya-Allah Risha! Hamsa-tasy'asyar! Masya-Allah!" - ( Masya-Allah, Risha! 15! Masya-Allah!). I, was distracted. I thought he pricked my fingers to find out about my blood sugar level. If I have 15 for a blood sugar level means I'm super diabetic -.-'

When he said that my Hemoglobin level was 15.7, I was like, "Oh...really? What does that mean? Am I qualify?" because the way he said, "Masya-Allah", it sounds like something....bad. Then he said, "Tammam giddan!" - ("It's really good!") , *sigh of relief*.

*grin widely*, yayyy! I qualified!

I found out that the normal Hb level for woman is 12.1 - 15.1 gm/dcl. Mine was 15.7, and it showed that I qualify. The technician always say that not many woman came in, and show more the reading of 15 gm/dcl when they measure their Hb level, *sedikit rasa bangga di muka*. Well, it's a no wonder that my blood taste like rust, and I hate the smell & taste of it!

As for Aye, she was not qualify to donate because hers was below 10, and she could be anemic.

So then, I moved into the van, sat at the chair and then they start to get busy. First, the doctor took my blood pressure, then, gave me a bottle of water (..yang payau...) asking me to finish one bottle of it. That's when the techie start to do his thing. Needles, tube & blood bag.

Let the picture do the talking,

Anyways, after donating blood, I realize all the fun of it. Plus, I felt great that I could get my blood to do something for others. I hope my blood could be use in a good way, to save live and sort. Well, I'm still in Med School, I still can't help with patients but I hope my blood can save lives.

Also, from now on, I will start to be a regular donor. The next time I can donate is after 3-4 months. Well, it means that my next time would be around February/March.

After the donation, alhamdulillah, I didn't feel any nauseous of dizziness. I just drank something sweet, eat like usual, and I feel fine. Well being accompanied by friends was one of the precaution because if I went donating alone, something might happen after I donate. Either I can faint in the middle of the road or anything. When there's friend with you, at least they know what's wrong with you. However, alhamdulillah, I felt fine after the donation.

Oh, there's also after-effects of the needles :( THIS :

BRUISES!

Macam mangsa dera kan?

*sobs*

P/S : Come on people, let's donate blood!

Boring Bleh.

2011-10-29T05:15:00.000+08:00

A : AVAILABLE

Blehh.

B : BIRTHDAY

Christmas 1992

C : CRUSH ON

None, somehow I feel pathetic about this, hah.

D : DRINK YOU LAST HAD

I had a sip of pineapple juice

E : EASIEST PERSON TO TALK TO

Nado & Unnie

F : FAVOURITE SONG

Coagualation (응결) by SJ-K.R.Y

G : GUMMY BEARS or GUMMY WORMS?

OHMYGAHHH I LIKE GUMMY WORMS!

H : HOMETOWN

Johor Bahru.

I : IN LOVE WITH

Wookie's cheeks, Ming's perfect teeth, Heech's feminine hands KYAA KYAA

J : JUGGLE

I have really bad bad hand coordination. So, juggling's not for me.

K : KILLED SOMEONE

I killed some aliens virtually. On game. Does that count?

L : LONGEST CAR RIDE

Kelantan-JB. Seriously.

M : MILKSHAKE FLAVOUR

Strawberry & Chocolate OHNOMSSSS!

N : NUMBER OF SIBLINGS

3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3

O : ONE WISH

Travelling. Like lots of travelling (..with money).

P : PERSON YOU CALLED LAST

A junior of mine, Tasha.

Q : QUESTION YOU DON'T LIKE

"How much do you weigh?" - quite sensitive when it comes to this -.-'

R : REASON TO SMILE

The Ammu at the shop will give discount, Ammu taxi won't charge for the ride, give Maliziyin a good image (..bleh...)

S : SONG YOU LAST HEARD

Home (feat Lee Sora) by Tablo

T : TIME YOU WOKE UP

It depends on how lazy I am on that particular day.

U : UNDERWEAR COLOUR & PATTERN

Monkey pattern? BYAHAHA :DD

V : VEGETABLES

I NOMSS ALL OF VEGGIES except bitter gourd & peas.

W : WHAT'S YOUR FATHER/MOTHER's JOB?

X : X-RAYS YOU'VE HAD

Esophageal X-Ray when I was a kid because I swallowed an eraser at school.

Y : YODEL OR YOYO FOR A NEW HOBBY?

I've tried yoyo before. Yodel's new. I'm eager to try that!

Z : ZODIAC

Capricorn :)

P/ S : I'm just....bored.

Stop This Weak Feeling.

2011-10-27T17:06:00.001+08:00

"Risha, cuba kau try. Tangan Risha kuat kot"
"Aku tau, tangan Risha kuat. Dari UKM dulu lagi aku dah tau, Risha kan kuat. Semua orang tau Risha kuat. Kau kuat kan?".

*shoot*

Bila kau kata aku kuat berulang-ulang kali, shoot aku jadi lemah.

Just, stop talking. I don't want to feel weak. Feeling strong make me feel superior, feel in control.
I don't know why you talk a lot, and stutter. Be comfortable.
Don't make this hard for me, thank you.

- ASKSSL;ALKAKAL;ASS HOLE AKSK;S WHAT'S WRONG WITH YOU? AKSKS:AS!

On Twitter!

2011-10-24T08:00:00.003+08:00

I'M ON TWITTER!

Okay, that's nothing new.

I have been a Twitterholic since back then, back in 2008, and I have been loyal to Twitter since then. Yeah, check the tweets, dude. 32K tweets now, going 33K. I was "that" loyal. Hah. Also, Twtter is my most comfortable place, to me. If compare to other social networks *shrugs*.

I don't really know what get me onto Twitter but I guess I should blame my curiosity. I was one curious child, back then (..maybe, still am *shrugs*). I was an avid watcher of Ellen DeGeneres's talk show "Ellen" and she was talking about something called "Twitter", so being a curious child I was, I made a Twitter account!

Then, I started to talk my friends into making Twitter, being the first one, Sai, Sero or Timah, then followed by the rest (..of TM-ers), like Dhinah, Zue, Nado, Emo, etc. Back then, we TM-ers "conquered" those Twitter thing. I mean being the first group of friends (practically part of the class...) to be hyperly active on Twitter, being the internet savvy we were.

Also, I, at that time "sedang berjinak-jinak" with KPOP, so there were a lot of fan-based accounts on Twitter updating things from my biases. That's what get me hooked. Making something KPOP trending on Twitter was like an achievement (..I was part of the fan community back then, and was always an active member). So, like almost everyday, my tweet per day stats was around 110+ tweet per day. Impressive. Like real, impressive. Haha :D People think it was annoying to see me updating every 10 second, but funny, I think it was impressive. I mean, you don't talk with people that much in a day, but you tweet 100+ tweets per day?

Also, that was when my ultimate bias at that time (..and still is), starting to be on Twitter. Super Junior, I mean. The first to be on Twitter was Shindong. Back then, getting Koreans or the perfect term was "finding Koreans" (..especially celebrities) on Twitter was rare. Partly because at that time there were still no Twitter apps for Koreans to use, and they don't really know English. Shindong being the first one on Twitter got me all hyped up. At that time, I was hoping that the rest of the members would get on Twitter as well. I still remember that day when Heechul was Twitter. Hahahaha :D

I was like spazzing on Twitter with CAPS LOCK for 6 hours straight -.-'

But I did all that during my idle days while waiting for my SPM result. We had crack sessions between Sero, Timah, Zue, Amaaa, Nado, Zue, & Brian (..where is this guy, now?) until late night, namely "Sesi Tuwit Dalam Bahasa Ibunda" where we have to tweet in Malay, and all those stupid things came up.

Also, there was times we play #hashtags and make #hashtags for our classmates. Hahaa :DD

I miss the old days!

Before, I didn't private my Twitter. Probably because I think there's only us TM-ers there. And I thought I won't annoy people with my randomness, rants on other social networks like FaceBook or MySpace. So, Twitter is the place for my crack, fandom, and pervertness. Tsk.

But now, I set my tweets to private eversince friends in Egypt start to make Twitter and all. It's not that I don't want to approve you but probably because, people who follow me there, is more familiar with how I am, and how I was. So, they don't get all "WTF, is this Risha?" when I tweet,

"OHMYGAH, WHY YU SO HOT I FEEL LIKE LICKING YOUR ABS!",

Partly, because they already know that I'm like that. Hahaha :D

The point of this post is to clarify to my (..new..) friends here (..in Egypt), why I didn't approve their follow request on Twitter, because I've been asked few times already.

I've reserved Twitter for my old friends.
I don't wish you to know how pervert I am.
I don't wish you to know how bad my fandom is.
I don't wish you to know how different my level of fandom is.
I don't wish you to know foul my mouth is (..though I bet you already know I have foul mouth).
Funny, I don't want you to know everything about me. A little is okay, but my private life is only public to some people.
At times, I become so independent, I don't tell people my problem, but I tell Twitter. So, when I stay in Egypt, when I have problem, I don't tell people about it. I rant about it. I rant, okay? So, I know people in Mansoura. Like hello? Mansoura is one glory hole of boredom. People here sometimes takes "gossiping" as one of their weekend activities (..or daily activities? Suit yourself). So, my tweets are seriously controversial, at times. And, it can become a subject of interest for gossiping. Not good. So, when I rant (..there are times....), my followers are mainly are friends from old school are the ones that will read. They don't know you, so they don't talk about you or gossip about you. Instead, they'll think I'm PMS-ing. Or, having stress management issues. Hahaha :D
Also, I found out that if I didn't private my tweets, I could easily get spam bots on my followers. Not cool
And oh, my crack talk, my pervert talk on Twitter sometimes appear on Google. Again, not cool.
Again, I don't wish you to know how pervert I am.

This is all crap-shitting-bullshit. The main reason I private my tweets is because of people's gossips. I know the people who tracked down & stalk people's profile, to find source for their gossip subject. Hah, stupid.

Anyways, Twitter's fun. I never get bored of it. And I've seen people unfollow me because I tweet bombs! Hahaha :D

Have You Seen My ______?

2011-10-22T21:23:00.003+08:00

As expected, it hasn't even been for 5 weeks of half of the semester, but I already lose motivation, lose concentration, lose all those "semangat" that I had during first day of semester. Damn, this is not good.

Today, I'm supposed to have Pathology lecture at 9:30AM until 10:30AM, followed by Pharmacology lecture at 10:30AM until 11:30AM. Then, at 12PM, I would have my first-time Early Experience session where we would have to go to the University's Hospital and do the what-not.

But this morning, I couldn't even wake up.

Also, I have this problem where every morning, no matter how early I woke up, when I'm still lying on my bed, I would go with, "Ahhh, I don't feel like going for class. I'll skip class for today". And it happens again, this morning.

So, I missed 2 lectures, and I would have to attend the EE session tomorrow. Bleh.

I don't where did all those motivation go, but I need to get them back. Should I put up a search notice?

*writing them search notice*

*paste them "HAVE YOU SEEN RISHA'S MOTIVATION?" all around Mansoura*

Mid semester examination, it is said to be on this 26th November, I can't afford to get low marks for this (..though it is just mid semester-50 MCQ question-shit) because I'm still with Dr.Nisreen, where of course she'll ask us our marks later during the 6th PBL session, *sigh*.

I have to score, dude. I have to.
I'm tired of feeling so stupid among my friends.
This "feeling of stupid" thing is eating me inside, though I find myself study more, trying to make myself at the same level with them.

Bleh.

Bleh.

2011-10-22T06:17:00.000+08:00

I become like this when I see books.

Dear God, give me strength to get through this.

Reason For My Ovary To Explode.

2011-10-21T22:23:00.001+08:00

I know this is probably possible, and by possible I mean, it is actually IMPOSSIBLE. But, if I could say something to my ultimate bias(es), maybe I would say, (..or in this case, SCREAM!) to them :

"CAN YOU GUYS PLEASE STOP FLIRTING & TEASING WITH EACH OTHER?

...AND GET MARRIED INSTEAD?"

You guys are killing me inside. Seriously.

*lari ketuk ketuk kuali*

These guys are probably straight (..I'm still confused with Wook's sexual orientation though -.-'), but I always make time for myself to believe (?) that they are gay, and will "come out" soon when they are older, and I wanna see their babiessss (..if Wook is one special human being, and he can prove that Male Pregnancy is not a fiction). Okay, weird.

Sometimes, I hope that what they always do on stage, aren't just fanservice. GAHHH, I don't like the word "fanservice".

*OVARY EXPLODE*

*practically screaming*
SEXAYYY DANCE ON STAGE

AS;ALSKS;;ALSKKS;;ADSD;;ASKDS, sometimes I hope they know the after effects of their sexying on me. I would curse curse, then start imagining them __________ then, having babies. Kyaaaaa!

SCREAM SCREAM SCREAM FOR MORE YeWook!

*headbang*

P/S : I was supposed to be studying, but then I got distracted and went for YeWook .gif hunt. Haiya.

P/S : I just show you that my fandom is on a different level.

P/S : Yeah, I'm no homophobic, instead, I adore them. KYAAAAAA.
P/S : I read too many fics. But, I don't want to stop.

The Way They Fight For Their Rights.

2011-10-17T05:21:00.000+08:00

My stay here in Egypt is always "something". Egypt is always, "something". I don't really know how to describe these with words. Maybe my lack of reading these days make me somewhat belittle the importance of it. I'm no longer creative like how I used to be. To be frank, I'm so disappointed with myself for my inabilities to describe things with words these days. I used to be good with this, I've seriously abandoned reading good reading materials. Ah, I miss the old days where my only source of pleasure is reading. I miss writing, as well.

It's not that I don't read these days, I do read a lot. I read a lot of facts. I read a lot of medical related books. It comes to the extend of feeling to throw up. Blergh. I'm mindfucked.

Anyways, the point of this post is on something that had happened earlier today.

Earlier this morning, I had my PBL session (..okay, let's skip this depressing part -.-'), then afterwards, I thought of skipping student presentation, but I just go on with the session, because I feel like there's no point of ironing the clothes early in the morning, getting ready early in the morning just for attending a 2 hour PBL session. So, I decided to just stay around, and attend student presentation. It was draggy & was already lost in my own world after the first group presented. Haiya.

Anyways, while we were in the lecture hall, we could here people chanting in Arabic, while there was a leader lead the chants using the hailer. The source of the sound was unknown, but we know it was right outside of our faculty.

Done with student presentation session, went out and I see these swarm of Egyptians (both male & female) were marching in this LARGEEEEEEE group in front of the new Dentistry building, heading towards the Faculty of Pharmacy. They were chanting this Arabic words that I don't even understand. Joining the crowd, I managed to take a short video on this :

Until just now, I finally got to know about what happened. Credit to Fawwaz Aizat, a colleague of mine & his mini conversation with one of our faculty's professors, Dr.Nisreen Omar (..oh no, not my Dr.Nisreen, the PBL tutor, HAHA).

Just read the following conversation, explains it all :

I know ever since the evacuation, the Tahrir Square revolution, Egyptians been trying to have their very own revolution including our faculty in Mansoura. This is not the first, I've seen such protest went on at our Faculty of Medicine. But, this is the first time seeing that it was this big.

It had been mentioned that the Egyptians students were not satisfied with no changes acted upon their faculty and stuff, so that's the reason why they did such protest. I think, now, protest has become a method for them to fight for their rights. They are inspired by the Tahrir Square Revolution, where almost a million of Egyptians gather to ask for Hosni Mubarak to step down from his position as the president.

They really believe that when they unite, they can voice out their opinions.

This is the power of people when they unite.

Somehow, I feel proud of the Egyptians. They unite, to fight for their rights.
But at the same time, I don't feel safe. Too crowded, people chanting here & there, it gives out this somewhat insufficiently protected.

However, I'm taking a good care of myself. Though, I can't stop being curious and feel like joining the crowd as well. Hah.

Also, I'm praying to God that let Mansoura be the safest place for me to stay. Though the evacuation process, Ops Piramid was an experience, I don't think I would want to go through the same thing again.

May God bless the Egyptians!

Credit : Fawwaz Aizat

Where's My Airbag?

2011-10-15T21:16:00.000+08:00

I can't even get properly drunk
But it's not like I avoid drinking session
Maybe it's because I don't want to be alone
Or is it because I want it to be obvious that I want to be alone?
Loneliness is a common things to me
Will I be able to share myself if there was someone by my side?
It's a question mark that I don't want to place at the end.

I need an airbag
Before I hit the great sadness that approaches
I need an airbag
It's too late to avoid it

On this night where I long for you
The rain comes and my heart gets slippery
I need you, yes I need you, my airbag

I guess I'm all alone again.

P/S : Tablo's back to inspire. This time around, the song came out at the right moment.

I've Underestimate Semester 3!

2011-10-13T07:49:00.000+08:00

Lack of updates recently on the blog because, I've been busy. Yeah, busy.

To be frank, I've underestimate Semester 3. Like for real.

Alright, first, I think I haven't tell you about my PBL groups since day one I went for PBL session. It's a story worth telling, because GAH ASKL;ALSKLSLAKA;AKSK yeah, it's my fate. Like I've mentioned before, my PBL tutor is Dr.Nisreen Mansour. Well, actually I've mistaken her for Dr.Nisreen Omar -.-'

Anyways, my PBL rocks! Haha, *sarcastic laugh*.

I'm with the same PBL group with Nadia Roslan, Raden Hamizah, Ahmed Kamal, Miya , Ainal, (..another..) Nadia, Maryuni, Hush & (..a new PBL mate which I don't know..), Haziq. Well, first, when I get into the PBL room, we were still joking around, wondering how our doctor would be. Apparently, most of us mistaken Dr.Nisreen mansour as Dr.Nisreen Omar -.-' So, when she first came, she already this sort of strong impression. She first said for us to keep quiet (..because we were loud), and during the discussions, she doesn;t like side talks. So, if you want to talk, raise your hand, talk.

Well, the case reviewing was not bad as well. We were asked to read line by line (..that's usual stuff), find difficult words or terms that we don't understand (..that's usual too), and explain what we understand based on the lines/paragraph (..this is new). So, my first impression was that this Dr. is very detailed & meticulous when it comes to work. I was thinking, "Yeah, I could get used to this".

Not until the next PBL session where we have to explain on the objectives we discussed earlier. Okay, let's see. This is the objectives for Case 1 :

Anatomy of Chest Wall
Physiology of Pleura
Apathy of Bystanders
Physiological Response to Stress
ATLS Protocol
Mechanics of Breathing
Clinical Aspect of Pneumothorax
Post Traumatic Syndrome Disorder
Cognitive Behavioral Therapy

Usually, during previous semesters, what we did was we divide the objectives among ourselves, and we'll explain on the objectives during the PBL session. Also, it varies between doctors of different groups to assign us to do all objectives, or not.

But this time around, with Dr.Nisreen, she asked us to do all objectives (..which is okay), but no dividing objective (..this is new!). Also, she'll point the person out on the day of the PBL session on who to present what. OH MY GOODNESS. OH MY GOODNESS.

So, during Case 1 - presenting session, I seriously take this not very seriously. I mean, I was thinking, how tough this doctor can be? I mean, I don't think she'll be mad when we don't do any 2 or 3 of the objectives, right? So, among all objectives above, I didn't do on #1, #4 & #6.

Guess what? She picked me for objective #1 ! Dr. Nisreen did.

Flabbergasted, but I still can control my emotions. Kalau tak control, boleh nangis kat situ jugak.
So, I was just flipping through notes that I did before I went for Anatomy practicals, and take note that the notes I made are just scribble scribble here & there. Also, I know I promised that I would try presenting without referring notes again this semester, but guess what? As I was trying to read the first line, Dr.Nisreen interrupted with, "I'm sorry Risha, but maybe you could explain by drawing? I don't want you to explain by reading the notes."

*SIGH*

There you go. Getting the shock of century, I remained silence through out the whole session. Imagine this, you have to do all objectives, you'll be pinpoint during the session itself (..which means you have to master all objectives), ON THE SPOT, and you have to explain without referring to the notes. Wow, hello reality. Hello, hello.

I realized I've been complaining much about this. I rant a lot on this on Twitter, like a lot. I told people about this. I JUST NEED FOR PEOPLE TO KNOW ABOUT THIS. I think this is hard for me to handle but then think again. This is for my own good as well. Well, Medic is difficult. But I've chose the hard way, and dang, there's no turning back now. From this point and on, every week during PBL session is an "exam session" for me. Awesome kan?

But, trust me, I can improve myself by the end of these semester, insyaAllah.

Now, I'm working on Case 2's objectives. Oh busy busy. Need to master all by Friday. Then, I will plan on group study. I need to start a group study (..though I actually prefer studying alone -.-' )

Ah, like before, I've said that this semester's topic of studies are easy. I'm taking back those words. It's not easy. Ya Allah, if Semester 3 is this hard, Semester 4 would be harder. I must work harder than ever.

Said to self, "Kalau tak settle semua ni, cannot attend Volley practice!"

As for now, I've been debating with self on self-discipline. I'm lacking with this, actually. Plus, my time management sucks balls.

Alright, a post full with rants, DONE!

Til then, byebyebye!

Filled, Less Lonely.

2011-10-07T06:48:00.000+08:00

The bliss of having one small single bed, but full with pillows and stuff animals.

The night feel less lonely.

3 Days of Catching Up

2011-10-06T00:44:00.000+08:00

Lack with updates these few days because of this :

Haha. Nado came to Mansoura with Thirah & Piqot. They just went back to Alex this morning, and started to miss them already. Thanks for coming :)

Here's a mini series from us! Thirah wasn't in this because she was tired & stayed home with Sue.

A mini series on : "When Aegyo (Acting Cute) Goes Bad" :

A mini crack series after those chickin eating, NOMS.

Anyways, class has started. I haven't start with my PBL yet & to make things busier, I'm presenting on Apathy of Bystanders this Sunday, but we as the whole group haven't even start any discussion on this. Taking things easy perhaps because this topic is easy. Hmm.

This is a short post, I'm revising the lecture slides, and...procrastinate. Ahah.

This Is The Starting Point.

2011-10-03T04:14:00.000+08:00

So, earlier this day I went to Gamaah, went to faculty to check things up on the new semester. Note that, I didn't attend Induction Lectures, since we had those lecture last year when we first got here in the university.

So, I went and check the PBL group list. Well, finding my name on the 1st group - PBL Group 1, and I found myself in a group with Aja (..hello, again!), Ainal, Yun, and.....Ahmed Kamal with few more I don't quite remember. The point here is, - Ahmed Kamal. Mulut masin sangat before this tak nak satu group dengan dia, dapat lah budak Egyptian seorang ni.

Ahmed Kamal is one of the top students, smart & very hardworking in our semester. But, no offence Ahmed. Your attitude is just...bad. That's all. Well, I've heard complains from others who was in the same group with him, and I've heard negativism more than positivism.

*sigh*, this is not the way to start a semester. I shouldn't be all negative about this, let's just see how we will work together in a group soon, Ahmed. Also, be nice, okay?

Not wanting to be unprepared through out the whole semester, so I've prepared the case book for Semester 3 already.
GILA SEMANGAT KANNNNNNN?

This semester, I have Dr.Nisreen as the chief tutor & PBL tutor as well. WAY TO GO! Getting a chief tutor, which also a group tutor is an advantage. Also, I've heard that Dr.Nisreen is nice & considerate. So, I'm looking forward for tomorrow for the 1st PBL session!

My *eggsited* face!

- Semester 3, be nice.

Fear Of Getting Attached.

2011-10-02T05:08:00.001+08:00

*knock knock*,

"Rumah kita ni sunyi sangatlah. Don't you feel lonely?"
"Really? why?"
"Ever since we got our own room. Sebelum ni, masa kat rumah lama, at least your room takda pintu, so yeah, senang nak keluar masuk"

- A convo between Hanim & I, just now.

I agree with this. But, I prefer this way. I like this way.
I don't want to get attached.
Don't ask me why, I don't know.

P/S : Hanim's back in Egypt.

Hello, October!

2011-10-01T10:23:00.000+08:00

There are 2 situations now.

#Situation 1

I'm still in Malaysia now. Everyday, I rant on the longer I stay in Malaysia, the more my hard disk drive space is being consumed. Probably because I download too much stuff until I run out of space. Also, I might still be eating & lepak-ing, doing my best gaining all those fats. Not exercising, of course. Everyday, I sleep after dawn, waking up nearly evening. Doing nothing productive. Everyday, I'll listen to the same nagging from either Ma or Ayah (..or both...) on packing my luggage back to Egypt.

Also, I might still be doing some last minute shopping, and still repacking, packing, and repacking my luggage to get til those 40KGs.

At the same time, I might still be doing some "disturbing". Maybe, I would tweet Nado on oh-so-yum-yesterday-I-went-eat-out-at-Seoul Garden-with-some-of-TMers. Jokingly, making her jealous that I'm still in Malaysia, enjoying my summer holidays.

Also, at the same time, everyday I'll stalk my group batch's FaceBook. Checking up on class updates etc.

#Situation 2

I'm in Egypt already! Mansoura, the glory hole of boredom to be exact. I'm back here early because I had to resit my Medical Terminology paper. I'm done with the papers now, it's just I haven't got the results yet.

So, everyday, I stay at home, alone, idly, entertain myself with all those movies or entertainment videos I have. Everyday, I eat alone. At night, I went out alone. Sometimes, I meet some friends up. But, rarely.

I have the desire to fill my times with some downloading. But fuck, the internet speed is so slow like siput babi. Oink oink.

Everyday, I rant so much on Twitter on how bored I am.

This paragraph of this situation is short, because practically everyday, I have the same life cycle.

..............................

To be frank, I really hope that I'm in #Situation 1 now, but the fuck. Reality is, I'm in #Situation 2.

1st October. The first day of October. Hello! I've been waiting for you because the start of this month is a sign of a new semester. I'm now officially am a Year 2 student!

From what I see, Year 2 - Semester 3 & Semester 4 is no easy thing like Year 1. Every year, it's getting harder. Well, though I heard it's tough, it doesn't mean that I'm backing up. I'll move forward, and strive for the best.

From what I've observed from past year's schedule. For semester 3, we'll be concentrating on Cardiorespiratory mainly. As for semester 4, here comes the hardest part. Most seniors flunk this semester.

Anyways, I have to double up the effort then. Some people are gifted, they are smart. So, only studying a little could get them good marks. Or maybe they pay attention in class or what so ever. As for me, I;m no gifted. So, I have to do the hard way, which means, double up the effort then.

I have a few new resolutions for this semester. It's not much to certain people, but to me, at least I need to improve.

When presenting during PBL session, I'm gonna do the "real" presenting type. No more paper-refering or reading through the papers.

Every practical sessions, especially for anatomy, pay attention. Usually, during these practical sessions, I'll just spaced out & day-dreaming.

Jayyid Jiddan - I don't know why I lack confidence. So far, I'm targetting for Jayyid Jiddan. Mumtaz is not impossible but I still lack with confidence. Some time later, maybe I'll change my target to Mumtaz.

No failure, no re-sitting. That's it. No more.

A little "organization" for my PBL case filing, perhaps?

Insya-Allah. With all these determination, and constant reminding, I'm going to try my best for this.

Oh, a little something-something I digged out from my pictures files.

Photos I took exactly one year ago, 1st October 2010.

How fast time flies, eh?

Confusion Ensues.

2011-09-30T12:23:00.000+08:00

To be frank, I don't know what's up with me. I don't feel I am me, recently.

I keep on insisting to be alone, but I'm already alone. When, I'm already alone, that's when my mind start whispering shitty things like, "You look at you, all alone. Don't you feel like having a companient by your side?"

I thought personality crisis only occur during the rage of puberty, but I tend to question myself a lot these days, "Have you find yourself?". Right now, I feel like I'm in the stage where I'm still clueless about myself. The stage where I'm tring to find myself.

I'm starting to watch sad romance movies. Worst, when the main characters are having mental breakdown, I feel the same. I feel the pain. I feel pathetic.

Every night, I thought off socializing. I thought off gathering some friends up and hang out. But when I called them, and when I just started to really hang out and talk, I withdrew myself.

Every night, I took a walk, randomly. My mind wanders and only God knows where my mind left my soul during all those walks.

I try to somewhat tweet, write, blog something cheery-happy-go-lucky, but...this is the result. My sentences are getting longer each day.

I've been meaning to try a lot of new things lately. New things that aren't me. Sketching, all these skipping ropes junk, poem-writing, growing plants.

Like, hello? Sketching? I've never even liked drawing, but then, I found myself getting a sketch book & a sketch pencil.

My alone walks now seems so lonely. I never felt this way before. I've always enjoyed my alone walks.

I haven't (..constantly..) thought of my family in Malaysia, ever since I got back in Mansoura.

I keep on trying to make myself feel special. I think all these "weirdness" from #1 - #9 will somehow make me feel special, someday. I don't even know how, don't ask further.

Also, I'm sorry if there's anyone who feel a little offended with all these changes that's going around me. Maybe, I didn't pick up your calls. Maybe I didn't reply to any of your calls/smses/messages/tweets. Maybe, I start calling you less. Maybe, I act a little cold. Maybe, I've hurt you with my thorns of words. Maybe, I've been getting myself away from you a lot.

My deepest apologies.

Even, I don't know how to work this out. The main core problem, I don't even know what it is.

To say, "leave me alone", won't be right because I'm already alone.
To say, "help me, be with me", I don't feel like doing so because I might hurt your feelings in the process.
To say, "I'm even in a clueless state", is maybe the best for now.

My mind is not the place, for now.
Thank you.

Day-Dreams Get Me Going

2011-09-29T09:45:00.004+08:00

Ambitious.

Yes, I'm very ambitious. I have lots of things that I want to accomplish in my life, but I don't know if time will let me. Waking up everyday, I realize that I'm nearing to the day of my death. I don't know when will I die. If I knew about it, by now I would plan things out to live my life.

To every little things that I want to do, everything starts with a simple day-dream or motivation. I want to do a lot of things. Seriously.

Though there are ridiculous things I want to do before I die, such as, trying laughing gas for once, or hike Mount Kinabalu, I think it's not impossible to accomplish.

At times, when I was on the verge of breaking down, on the midst of giving up my life, I remembered all the things that I want to accomplish in my life. I remember all that, and I keep on going.

For example, I never would have thought I'll be here in Egypt doing my Medicine degree. I seriously would never have thought of it, though ever since I was in my primary school, I've been filling the "Ambition" part with the word - Doctor. Growing up, Ma & Ayah always say, "Do your best for your studies, get a scholarship to pursue your studies in Medicine".

Now that I'm doing Medicine, at times, I feel it's hard. Medicine is never easy. It may seem easy, but the result, you'll be just one average doctor. You can't just going for General Practitioner, these days. You have the be the best of the best. So, to be the best of the best, you have to "do" extra. So, during those tiring study week where we had to study for the whole weeks given for our examination, there will be time I feel like throwing up and mindfucked dued to over-studied.

I have reconsidering or at least thought about giving up, at least twice every revision week. No joke.

Or at least scream at my housemate, "WHY DO I EVEN BOTHER TAKING MEDIC!"

During those time, then, I will get back on track, and continue doing what I am doing now. Thanks to all those day-dreams.

I would day-dream (..note to self, that I day dream a lot..), that I'm in those classy white, clean lab coat with a stethoscope hanging on my neck. Then the old uncle uncle & aunties aunties will whisper to each other, "Anak sapo tuu?", "Ohh, tu anak Ery & Zie. Dah jadi doktor dahh", "Haihh, bertuah mak pak nyo". I would save life, I would bring a life to this cruel world, making my parents proud of me.

At times, I would day-dream that I was on a plane, and there would be a medical emergency. I would picture myself, being two person at that time. A doctor, and just a plane passenger. During that situation, being a doctor, maybe I would save the life. Being, the later, maybe I will have the urge to help, but because of not having or knowledge on Medical, I wouldn't know how to save the life. A waste is it?

Those simple day dreams, get me going.

To be frank, there are few things that I want to achieve in life.
It may sounds immature, but I want to feel first class, in the future.

I want to be treated, first class.

Still, I got to work my ass off. Pay all the deeds (..those uncountable deeds...) to my parents first, get them to be on the "First Class" before me.

My early salary would be be spent on them first thing first. To pay back for the past (..though, I know it's not possible to pay all of them back, since their deeds are to infinity).

That's my promise.

So, Allah S.W.T, you heard every of my prayers, right? Almost every day I ask for the same thing. Please, grant my du'a.

I have so many to do, just don't take them away now. Thank you.

One By One.

2011-09-27T07:03:00.000+08:00

Semester 3's approaching!

Hello there Year 2 Medical Year!

Alhamdulillah, no fails in my Semester 1 & Semester 2 examination, and I'm through Year 1! Well, there are still room for changes for the next semester insyaAllah.

Since Year 2's approaching, one by one my batchmates are coming back to Mansoura. Tonight, I went out with Fatin and she just got back yesterday :)

Went out, had dinner at Dominos then, take a walk from Metro until home. Well, catching up was good. Except for, I'm so perfect when it comes to making everything awkward. Haha :D

I haven't met or contact Fatin since our last semester, months ago. So, when she called me earlier, I was like, "YOOOOOOOO! GILAAAAA!" and then pot pet pot pet. Haha. When meeting back, catching up, and I managed to make things awkward! Yayyyyy *throws confetti*. I don't know if I'm the only one feeling so, but when I'm awkward, I talk, but avoid eye contact, and instead of looking at the person's eyes when they talk, my mind will wander off looking at the other person's glasses, or nose, or lips, or pimple, or mole. Okay, bad habit.

Anyways, it end up all good. It will be better in few days. After ni, mulalah aku menggesel-gesel kat Fatin balik. Haha :D

P/S : Oh Fatin, thank you belanja Dominos

Nice, Eh?

2011-09-26T00:42:00.000+08:00

"I thought you're nice girl.... Aku ingat kau ni baik, tapi...."

Coming that from a person who judge based on my appearance. Dude, that's what you get for judging me too fast. Sorry to disappoint you, but I'm not. Mind you, that I don't need your opinion on how I should be, how I should act, how I should live.

I know who I am, really. I'm not nice.

* You might think this post is a post where I'm trying to be such a bad ass motherfucker. Well, I'm not a BAMF, to be frank. I'm still decent, and probably my sanity level is still reasonable & sufficient. But, I'm not nice like how people might portray me as. I'm telling no lies, I'm not nice.

** But, I can be nice. Which means, pretending.

*** To the ones I loved, let me tell you one thing. I won't die for you. Why would I? But, I'll risk my life to not let you die. Be it, if I would die.

Teuk's Condom & Hyuk's G-Strings

2011-09-25T21:46:00.000+08:00

I feel the urge to share this because I'm a pervert like that. Hahaha.

This is a fancam of Super Show 2 : Manila, 10th April 2010.

This is old, I know.
BUT IT'S EPIC NO MATTER HOW MANY TIMES I SAW THIS!

The infamous incident of Teuk collecting condoms that were being thrown by Perv Pinoy ELFs. Min was just totally laughing things off. Judging from this, looks like Min "knows" MORE than Teuk on this....err, stuff. *awkward*. Partly because, you could see Min initiates Teuk to "check" the gifts out that were being thrown to them on stage, with Min's meaningful smile & laugh. LAWLL Then, somebody throw white & red G-Strings at Min, Min took a look, trying to figure out what was it, then he told Teuk. Teuk, most likely went "진짜?" ("Jinjja?" : "Really?"), and curiousity kills the cat. Teuk unrolled the white G-Strings, when he found out what it was, he shockingly threw it away. This reaction got me laughing like crazy. Haha :D

And you could see Teuk were just throwing collecting those condoms, laugh it off then throw them condoms to the fans. I know, what the heck Teuk. Min was just laughing away, and smacked Teuk lightly.

Min taking the box of briefs. Fans, were just....cheering. What the heck.

Then, here comes Hyuk. The innocent Hyuk. My goodness. I love his reaction! Min was pointing and asking Hyuk to find out what are the things that were being thrown at him before, the G-Strings! I just love the part where Hyuk patiently rolling those red G-Strings off, not knowing what it was at first point. Then when he found out, he face was like too traumatized I feel like dying laughing. My goodness.

Haha, Pinoy ELFS, the best! Way to go at "impressing" those boys.

History Of Blogging.

2011-09-25T03:05:00.000+08:00

Yosh! This time around, I'm back again posting (...hopefully, constantly *shrugs*). Well, after I did a renovation on the blog, I also enabled the viewing my older archive, so testing the tabs out before, I've read a few of my older posts. But, it was 3AM or so, so I thought I might checked the rest later.

Then, I just got the time to reread my older posts. The older posts from 2008, the earliest.

MY GOODNESS, I'M HAVING A GOOD TIME LAUGHING!

...AT MYSELF, to be exact.

Oh, those immature writings got me all facepalm, (..malu sangat, rasa nak sorok dalam washing machine..)

So, a little intro on how I start blogging.

2008 | MySpace Era

During these time, kami yang remaja ni sibuk dengan MySpace. Memang MySpace dulu diagung-agungkan. Gambar MySpace every day kena tukar, and gambarnya, bukan sembarangan. Mesti macam ini :

MUNCUNG ITIK IS A MUST!

*JOM GELAK RAMAI-RAMAI*

Hahaha, gelak lah. Gelak lah. Korang dulu pun macam ni juga. Ada tu yang selalu post kat Bulletin "PC4PC", saja nak mintak penuh picture comment. Oh, tak tau PC4PC tu apa? It's a term exists for MySpacers back in the day, PC4PC - "Picture Comments 4 Pictures Comments". This term is used for MySpace whores yang kurang kasih sayang yang perlukan orang membanjiri ruang picture comment mereka.

Ada tu pulak, yang caption picture commentnya, "100 COMMENTS : FULL!", "59 COMMENTS : 41 MORE! Puhleez lah add comment" padahal gambar yang diambil cumalah gambar selca yang satu s enyum, satu buat muncung itik. Hmm, sangat kelakar. It's as if I talked by experience, eh? No way. If I did that in the past, of course by now I'll dig a tunnel and hide in there forever. But, what I did, wrote, say back in the past are equally embarrassing as well.

So, in the past, MySpace featured this thing call "MySpace Blog", right? That was when I started blogging for real. Well, in the past, I mostly write on, how was school treating me, my daily rants and all. The embarassing part of it is the language. Oh my goodness. Here comes the part where I feel like fleeing off to another country where the citizen or native (..if it's that bad) don't even speak a fucking single word of English or worst, Bahasa Malaysia.

Well, take a look at this :

Kawanku;NADO (series 1) | January 20th, 2008

(....akhu knal beliau tyme form1.
mase thu aku kelas 1 Muzik 2.
first impression aku terhadap die,"alimnya budak neyh!..."
aku mula wonder dari skula mane ek si dye neyh!...)

This is one of the post I wrote in MySpace on Nado. The language, *sigh*. I'm sorry, I'm never gonna do that again. *hides under blanket*

After that posts, that's where I start blogging for real. I signed up for Blogger & start blogging.

At first, I did some blogging secretly. I mean, I hid the blog from public review and nobody knew its existence. Here's the link to the blog I first used on Blogger : Click! And be Dissapointed Sorry, to dissapoint you, this blog is not for public. It has too many rants. Immature rants to be exact. Well, I actually just read them few hours ago out of curiosity. I wrote mainly on friends inside here. Hmmm.
To be frank, I was very....expressive & full of angst. And maybe I was writing while I was too annoyed I guess.

Truthfully, tell me. Are you curious to read what's inside? Tsk. Dream on.

Until, one day I read an article or rather a...debate? The forum was debating on "What's the point of blogging when you blog privately?". I know. It's an immature topic for a debate but mind you, i was young and....immature (...still am, I guess *snicker*)

So, then, I made a new blog, dated on 14 September 2008.
This is the introductory post :

(...I realised what's the point if I create a blog site and keep it private huh? Lucky you . I create this blog to satisfied what you want to read . What you've been meaning to find out what 's up with me . That's fine i guess.....)

LAWLL. One word, VAIN. Haha :D I don't even know how did I get all that confidence -.-'

Anyways, then I keep on blogging on & off up until now. Well, I don't think I have any "fans" to my blog, partly because I'm doing this for my own self. I write what I want, and I is no write fun stuff. I also don;t write anything juicy or scandalous or mocking (..I think so....?). I write mainly about myself.

Hmm. Also, reading some of my older posts, I realized the "killer" immaturity. I wrote on a lots of immature stuff. Reading them again, I feel like hiding under my covers again.

Some of my immature & emo posts : Feel free to laugh. Thank you.

Captain Tak Guna | February 21st, 2009

(..Tak Guna.
Tak Guna.

Terima Kasih.

Sekali lagi aku menunjukkan kecelakaan aku sebagai seorang Captain...)

Summer Camp 5TM | July 15th, 2009

("Sha , kan best kan kalau ada tahun depan kita buat Summer Camp satu kelas kat Pulau Tioman ?")

Siapa Manwhore? | July 28th, 2009

(...tahap ke-ManWhore-an 5TM semakin menjadi-jadi. Hal ini menjadi igauan ngeri bagi setiap golongan ibu bapa sebab mereka tidak mahu anak anak mereka terlibat dengan kancah "KEGATALAN MELAMPAU". Maksud saya bagi kegatalan terlampau di sini tidak bermaksud gatal gatal dis eluruh badan atau penyakit kurap & sebagainya tetapi kegatalan terlampau terhadap kaum Agam. Situasi ini juga boleh dipanggil "OBSES TERHADAP KAUM ADAM"...)

My New Friend, R4 | January 9th, 2010

(.......I was awaken by the sound of loud, harsh & annoying noise. I mumbled gibberish on the matress hoping that someone would realize that I was already awake. I heard my parents talking & chuckling downstairs while I heard my dad said, "Wow! Good!"

Then I heard draggy steps heading towards my room. I pretended to sleep but then my Dad shook me & said, "Shaa, bangun. Kawan kau datang. Dia tunggu kat bawah. I was still clueless but then I just got off by bed & curious to know..... )

Vulgar Mind | May 18th, 2010

(...You know, they say curiousity kills the cat.

I wonder if curiousity will really kills this cat named Risha Nazneen.

Hmmm?...)

Also, though reading all these posts make me go all facepalm, hiding under the blanket covers, or, really.

ASHAMED. But, those are the pasts. Those are part of me growing up. I did stupid things, write something bollocks.

Those are pasts, and I'm glad I did blogged on it. At least, I still have some memories of them, written.
...and I see myself growing up from all those immaturity.

Oh, wait, have I? *snicker*

Til then, YOSH!

Photograph Each Day.

2011-09-20T07:20:00.000+08:00

Last night I slept late due to the making some adjustment on ze blog and OCD-ness on the blog, sucks. Finally, it took me 6 hours to change the whole layout of the blog, and publish a posts. Slept late, it means, waking up late as well. Waking up at noon, my body ache like crazy probably due to those bumpy mattress.

Had my shower as soon as I get off my bed (..suprisingly?), then I made lunch. I made curry with all vegetables I have, potatoes & aubergine, then boiled some spaghetti, all NOMS NOMS ala curry noodles. Having my late lunch around 2PM, then suddenly Ezzati called up saying she was done with her essay papers, plus ranting with all her might on how hard the paper was and she asked if I would wanna joined her & Ainal "jalan-jalan" near the Metro area. Well, since I didn't plan on doing anything earlier that evening, I just went with the plan.

Met them up at Pizza Hut after they finished with their lunch then we head to this one new clothing outlet, just being opened. "Terranova"'s the name.

First impression, it reminds me of Primark in London. Haha :D The clothes were fucking cheap if compare to other tacky clothing store. The standard is up to Ravin, but the price is cheaper. Plus, the apparel style is not the tacky kind of style (..you know the Egyptian's 'tacky style'..) Also, they are having sale this few days to commemorate their newly opened store. It's a 3-leveled store. The 1st floor & Ground floor, Terranova's clothing brand while 2nd floor's for La Senza & JB Clothing. The price are fucking cheap.

Well, it's a pity that I don't feel like shopping though I've actually find what I like in the store. There are few shirts that I like & I already picked what I want but then I have this sudden headache (..due to many people pushing here & there, and those people apparently are Egyptians women -.-'), so I put everything back and get out of the store. Tak tahan meh.

Yeah, the price were fucking cheap. Most of the stuff in the shop is priced from 19LE to 59LE. No joke.

Later, after Maghrib, after spending half an hour at Zzati's place, we went to Zzati's cousin's place to get her stuff & sort. WE MET JIJI! Oh my, he's grown into a teen now! He still looks smart (..I have this perception of some cat having this intelligent look in the eyes), and Jiji's more well behaved now. No more jumping around & biting. Ahh, so tiuttt.

Ah, on our way back & forth from the cousin's place, to Zzati's place (..since she dragged me around to find herself a pillow), there were a lorry stopping by near the Ketchup area. It caused some congestion to be frank, adding to the fact that there are few weddings tonight so the honking went a little violent tonight. The lorry, apparently is loaded with loads of chilled fruit juices in large container & there are few young workers distributing drinks on the road. You know these Egyptians love to roll down their sexy (?) windows, so these workers were throwing bottles of juices.

Heh, I love free stuff. Especially, if it's food *sparkling eyes*. So, when we crossed the road, we did realized the commotion and all but with no intentions to join the crowd, but there's this one young man keep on saying, "Bi balash. Asir bi balash" - ( "It's free. Free juices (drinks)" ) while pointing at the workers who were busy distributing drinks. That caught one of the worker's attention and he gave Ezzati & I each fruit juices each. I guess it's a new brand so they were doing some sort of promotion in the middle of the road or something.

So, then I stopped by at the small store to get myself loaf of bread, then I found those same exact fruit juices in the fridge. I asked the Ammu, how much does the drink costs and he said it's 3LE. Upon hearing that, Ezzati & I evilly planning to get more of those drinks. Hahaha :D So we went back and forth to different workers and ask for more while hiding the other drinks in our small bag. Haha. Ended up, we managed to get 7 drinks altogether! Haha :D

After going back & forth, left with 5 because we already gulped down 2!

One thing I love about being in Egypt is we Malaysians always receive their attention. Attention as in, we are considered as foreigners, so at times they treat us real good & show us some of their bias side towards us. I've never really practice this in Malaysia, but there's this thing I always do when I'm around Egyptian guys. Act fucking friendly, smile a LOT at him/them, and always try to spark a conversation with them with your Fail Egyptian Arabic. Haha :D

So, yeah. I'm sorry. I act a little cold to Malaysian taxi drivers, Malaysian Ane at Mamak restaurant, Malaysian men (?). But when I'm in Egypt, wah senyum sampai nampak palatine tonsil. Haha :D Well, that's the key for me to always get free stuff and free taxi rides. Always, try to have conversation with them, and be friendly to those Ammu and old ladies. HOWEVER, if they (..the men) start to talk about wanting to get married with you (...the females, of course -.-'), you just be shut up, act like you don't understand what they are saying. Or in other words, LARI. Run for your life. Hahaha :D

Til then, take care!

Catching Things Up Pt. 2

2011-09-17T03:36:00.000+08:00

...this is the continuation.

6. Hari Raya 2011

This time around, our first raya, we went for Rawang first. Then on the 2nd day of Raya, we went to Seremban. Let the pictures do the talking, shall we?

Cheras, Kuala Lumpur.

This was taken a day before Raya. We went to Arwah Atok Karim's grave.

Rawang,Selangor.

Sama kan baju Jay, Ejiq & Ayah with the curtains back there? Haha :D

This is what we call, "SERBU". Haha :D

We are of the same size, eh? Haha :D Hari Raya means, "MAKAN!" Haha :D

Ma had to be escorted due to her knee injury. Karpet merah, marrrri!

Rembau, Negeri Sembilan.

Revisit our kampung in Rembau.

My great great grandmother is almost 90, but she's still this strong. This old woman, is very strong willed, God bless.

Oh yes, he loves sneaking up to my plate!

Meet Dikye (Azriel), he's my favourite. Ever since he was small, I've been taking care of him & now he looks like me (?)

Jay met his old playground. This was the spot where he fell down from the tree & fractured his arms. Yearsss ago.

Went to Arwah Pak Long's grave.

7. Those Last Few Days Before Fly Off, Baby!

Soon, after Hari Raya. I've met Sero on my last day in JB before I head for Egypt. Well, I've got to spent my last day in JB with one of my favourite person in the world. Truth is, I guess we'll start off awkward cause it has been more than 5 months we haven't met but then, it turns out okay. Sero is still a psycho like how she used to be. Crazy, but sane enough.

I am surprise myself that we talked mostly on things that I love the most, or something that I could say I'm rather pay more attention on to. Well, it's not fandom this time around, okay? I'm talking about blood types. Funny, but I have few in my circle of friends that are interested in such topic, but Sero & I spent almost the whole day talking about blood types, and Sero talked about horoscope etc. She even mentioned on something called aura reading. Interesting. VERY INTERESTING.

Sero dah...feminine. Oh, mommy so proud of youuuu! Haha :D

Doing what we always did back in the days, downloading & sharing. Haha :D

One stalker pic from Sero, right thoarrr.

Ala kuci kuci, malu pulak dia.

Had lunch (?) at Vivo. Ahh it's been a while, eh?

Smile.

Sero yah, maybe we should take up metaphysics, no? Hahaha :D

Aishh, I should finish my Medical degrees first.

Also, later that night, I went to Jay's hostel to meet him for the last time before I fly off.

Excuse the "terencat" Haziq, and yes Jay was eating -.-'

I don't even know why Ejiq would love to smile like that these days -.-'

The tall & proud, Ejiq. The same height, Jay & I.

8. Approaching Reality

Departure, Changi Airport. Ejiq couldn't be there to send me off since he had camp to attend, while Jay was in hostel. So, Ma & Ayah send me off.

Hati, sebenarnya sangat berat. Bukan sebab takut homesick, tapi, hati tak tenang. I want to be there for my fam when they are in problems. Now, I could only wish they'll be strong. Pray.

I seriously got a window wing seat! Wheeee~

The plane was pretty empty. Nobody's beside me.

From Singapore to Jeddah, the seats beside me was empty. Good enough. The flight to Jeddah, was okay. Then, transiting in Jeddah for 14 long hours with no hotel or place to sleep. So, wandering around the airport it is. Long hours at the airport, it was tiring much, I feel like dying. I was so bored at there was soooo many people. Mostly, those people are pilgrims who just performed their Umrah.

So, the place was packed with people. Note to self, smelly too. Aishh.

Yeah, 14 hours transit means, STUDY!

Hello stubborn Egyptians! Tsk.

To be frank, I was right behind that red hijab grandma, then pthose people kept on cutting my queue -.-'

Also, as usual, Arabs being Arabs. Stubborn, unethical and AASKDFLD;ASKKDKSLSL, but I have to be patience all over about it, *sigh*.

I'm just gonna skip the part where I arrived at Cairo airport. That was somewhat bitter memory. Aish.

Anyways, anyhow, TOUCH DOWN CAIRO! *sigh*.

9. Reality Hits - Medical Terminology

Yeah, the reason why I had to come back early to Egypt when my new semester will start early October is because I have to resit my Medical Terminology. Shucks enough because this paper's mark is not included in my examination marks, and the paper is just 1 hour. So, I'm actually back in Egypt weeks early for...this. Anyways, I'm done with the paper now. Just pray that I'll pass so I wouldn't have to repeat this again. Aiyo.

Embryology - boring. *sigh*

Now, that I'm done with Med Term & all, what I'm doing now is...lazying around. Hello, bed!

Hahaha :D

Also, I've been thinking to renovate the blog but I haven't see anything that caught my attention. Also, being all OCD on renovating the blog makes the process lengthy, *sigh*.

WAIT & SEE !

Catching Things Up Pt. 1

2011-09-16T09:37:00.002+08:00

What's up!

I'm just gonna skip th "Oh, I haven't post in the blog for a while etc etc blah blah" part, and say HELLO again!

Yes, I guess I have this habit of blogging when I'm in Egypt only. I don't even know why. Egypt is my reality, people. Malaysia is my paradise. Okay, I'm crapping.

Anyways, maybe I should summarize on things that had happened from the last date I've posted. Let's a go go!

1. The London Story

I went to London with Ma & Ayah for 2 weeks. I went straight from Egypt & met Ma & Ayah there. Oh, I miss London already! This time around, we went driving from London-Manchester-Liverpool-Lancaster-London. Ahh, maybe if there's chance I'll go to London again!

Heathrow Travelodge!

On the road to......Manchester?

BBQ-Day-Out in Liverpool. A very NOMS NOMS day!

The place we stayed during our stay in Manchester, Travelodge Manchester Birch, Westbound
.

OH MY GOODNESS! Marks & Spencer's Lemonade is ze best! *drools*

Aha. Of course, one of ze highlights, shopping. Sorry, were too immersed during shopping so not lots of pictures.

Trapped in sea of crowds in front of Buckingham Palace during the change of Queen's Guard.

The Queen's Guard.

Bulat kan pipi? Haha :D

THOSE BUSHY BUSHY HAT. GAHHH I is want.

Mama tengah settlekan masalah negara, saya menayang perut kenyang sesuka hati.

Lunch-on-the-go in the garden.

Went to Emirates Stadium. Ahh, my old man is so happy.

Our last day in London, a snap in the garden behind our apartment.

2. Oh, Ramadhan!

As soon, as we got back from London, the next day is Ramadhan. So, we spent our first buka puasa at Mak Andak's in Seremban. Meet these kids, ahh, dah besar dah adik adik Kak Alohm. Hahaha :D

I like her, because she didn't cry when I hold her. Well, maybe not yet eh, Qeela?

Aqish pun dah besar. Dah tak kaki lalak lagi. It's just she prefers male to play with her, rather than female. Psh, taknak
kawan!

Ezzam pun dah tukar title sekarang tu, "Abang Ejam". No more, "Adik Ejam".

Aqiel is no longer a Lone Ranger. He plays with Ezzam nowadays. By "playing", I also mean fighting 24/7. Kids~

3. It's Your Birthday!

On 10th day of Ramadhan, it was Ma's birthday! Happy Birthday Ma, God bless.

People say we look like sisters. Yeah, I'm the elder sister. Psh.

4. Obba's touch down!

Obba and her....eggsited face. Tsk.

Then, 2 weeks after I got back, I went to KL to pick Obbbbaaa with her mum. It was fun, getting the chance to see her Kajang family, very havoc & family-like. It was heart-warming. Then, I stayed over at her place few days after got back in JB. Though I didn't necessarily have to hibernate like her, but I don't even know why I follow suit. Sleeping from 7AM to 6.30PM. Teruk kannnn? Hahaha :D

*make eerie sound*

Najma :)

Najla. I agree that she has long limbs. maybe she'll have long legs afterwards, a model in future, perhaps?

Old Town White Coffee with Dodo, Dodo's parents & Auntie Limah.

Puas sedut perut tak, obba? Haha :D

Hek, I'm taller, dude. Haha :D

5. Friends, 친구 - TM-ers

Few days before Ramadhan ends, I finally got to meet some of the TM-ers. First up, I met Carl. She was still working and was still busy as Hari Raya's approaching so at times she had to work overtime & barely even had day off. So, I decided to break fast with her at her workplace, Plaza Angsana. Oh my God, I feel time moves so fast, we barely even catching up. But, I got to meet her, that's cool enough :) We lepak at Osman after midnight, summarizing our "catching up" stories. Sumpah, tak puas. It's okay. InsyaAllah, we'll meet again later.

Carl in her working uniform, hahaha :D

Thanks for spending time with me, Carl. InsyaAllah, we'll meet again later :)

Later than, I was supposed to meet Sai together with the other TM-ers for buka puasa. Unfortunately, Sai was admitted to hospital due to Dengue fever. So, Dodo & I pay her a visit.

Takda muka sakit pun kan? Haha :D

I look so big in this. Kekeke

Then, I had a chance to meet with rest! Aten, Yayang, Shelly, Timah & Dodo too :) We broke our fast at IT Roo Cafe, then walk backed to City Square.

IT Roo Cafe, Jalan Dhoby

Timah merajuk where Shelly has to pujuk her to eat. Haha.

I miss these two!

Dodo, Aten & Yayang.

Timah, wae yu do aegyo?

Timah being jealous of Dodo when Dodo "bermanja-manja" with her Omma Shelly.

Stalker-ish Timah

Timah's acting tiuttt. Teeheee :D

Then, left both of us, again. Haha :D

We've met each other, but too bad I can't meet others. Yana, Feyy, Yadha, Shieqa, Shikin, Naq, Aness, Chubb, Saf, Raja, Shima, Nedy, Zue, Nuri, Emo, Sai, Mira Kaka, O'od, Lilo, Fadh, Dhinah. I miss all of them .

...to be continued

Forbidden Word.

2011-08-10T20:17:00.004+08:00

Curiosity strikes, and I hate it when this kind of thing occur.

While just now I was preparing the food for breaking fast, suddenly I thought of this. I realized that nowadays people say what they want, even when they don't mean it. Bad words, sarcasm etc.

But I wonder if there are words/question/phrases/statement that people WON'T EVEN DARE TO SAY, and by "people", this apply to "WORLDWIDE" <- I'M GOING GLOBAL! LAWL :D

Something that nobody even dare to ask or say.

For example, in Harry Potter, "Voldemort" is sort of a forbidden word and his name is replaced with, "He who must not be named". Something like that, (..still Harry Potter said his name lots of time, and "Voldemort" doesn't count. Chett. This is merely and example).

I wonder what's the TOP 20 words/phrases/questions/statement that people won't dare to say but to be frank, what's word on Number 11.

Okay, I'm that curious and it kinda bothers me. Now, I can't get this out of my friggin' head.

Just gonna let this pass.

BUT I'M STILL CURIOUS :>

Currently, Resting.

2011-08-09T23:49:00.002+08:00

I attempted to post during my free time now, but what was left was all these draft post(s) -.-'

YES PEOPLE, I AM SO FREE UNTIL I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO!

Olleh!

Again, when I'm back in Malaysia, it always mean :

Wasting time
Sleep in late
Lazying around
"Ternak lemak"
11 hours of sleep

Yeah, that's practically what I do these day.

Right now, I'm having this habit of not doing the chores and mostly choose to lazying around whereby when I'm in Egypt, I'll do all the chores without people telling me to. My room in Egypt, is no messy like my room in Malaysia (..it's a lie if I say it's no messy -.-').

Do you have this feeling where you feel you've done to much, then you don't feel like doing them anymore? That's how I feel these days. Hehe. Eating my own cooked food at home, I feel "..blehhh".

As I'm here in Malaysia now for my summer holidays, I actually can't just lazying around. I got Embryology to study. Blehh. Malas mann.

Even I feel lazy to continue this post. KTHNXBAI.

I'm Taking Back The Words.

2011-07-10T14:23:00.002+08:00

Ayah & Mama allowed me to get a new charger.

They couldn't have the heart to see me going all mental alone in Mansoura, at home.

So, I have the movies, the series, the laptop & the charger, so I don't mind if I have no company.

So I could get on with my creative mode, writing something productive.

OLLEH!

SARCASM, Thank You!

2011-07-10T06:44:00.003+08:00

Mentally depressed, my laptop charger is ruined.

FUCK YEAH.

My life sucks.

Thanks for ruining my life.

I have exactly 12 days to London,

will be staying home alone in Mansoura for about a week before fly off,

this is getting boring.

Maybe I'll find myself tawaf around Metro area until I barf.

FYEAH, LIFE'S GREAT.

P/S : Rarely online.

This Is Mental Training.

2011-07-08T05:09:00.000+08:00

I'm quite busy now, I'm tired like hell but hey I'm still standing strong.

As soon as I got back from Alexandria, I went straight accomplishing things on my to do list(s).

DAMNNN.

This is tiring, my body's tired.

This reminds me of my past KRS marching squad, minus the squad captain yelling at your ears & heavy boots. Oh, the push ups as well.

I kept on whispering to keep on going, don't stop when I was transferring those damn heavy luggage from 3rd floor to ground floor.

Tired, dude.

Tired.

I'm moving out of GMN's block, now moving in to new house.
To & fro the old house to new house.
It's summer now.
Manually brought out the stuff from the old house, 3rd floor to ground.
No help from guys, just us girls using our inner MANPOWER.
To & fro to Syari' Mohd Fathi for the furniture because Arab are hopeless.
I just want to sleep & rest
Pissed of with all these debris. Cleaned for the 664875th time, but still dusty.
I can't wait to leave.

This is more like mental training, eh?

Plus, I think I lose weight.

Weariness make me exhausted & lose appetite.

It's okay, *kurus kurus before going back*.

Heee :D

Will update soon as soon as my laptop charger's healthy & less busy.

Thanks to Suraya Zupli's laptop or else this post won't exist.

No pictures, laptop's sick.

TIRED

Going to shleep.

BYE.

P/S : Chingusss who are already in Malaysia, congratulations. I'm leaving Egypt in...14 days ;_____;

P/S 2 : Year 2 seniors already got their final year result. Fuck yeah, I'm nervous for this.

Yet Again, Being Abandoned.

2011-07-04T07:39:00.004+08:00

I know, my final exam's over, and now I'm Nado's bed, posting this. Yet again, I've abandoned the blog. I can't seem to post regularly now though I'm sooooooooo free, til I don't know what to do. I think I need to give a make over to the blog.

Ze blog has lose it's charm.

OHOY.

Now that I'm here in Alexandria, I fell in love with the ocean.

Magnificent.

But I think I'm more of a slow water stream than the vicious water.

In simple way to say this, I like the river more than the ocean.

But, the sea is beautiful, MasyaAllah.

MY OVARY JUST EXPLODED!

2011-06-24T02:47:00.004+08:00

I'm a Heechul stan.

Too bad, I like everything about this guy including him in his Lady Gaga suit, dresses & heels.

THIS MUSIC VIDEO IS JUST....

*smack lips*

Highlight of this video :

Heech looks fuckable though he's in his usual all black
JungMo's OSMNESS rocking on all 4 : Bass, Electric, Drums & Keyboard
HOW DORKS THOSE CHOCOBALLS COULD BE WHEN THEY MEET UP?
Simon D, *smack lips*
HongKi's being adorable, Ohohoho *kipas kipas*!

Okay, I need to take care of this excessive bleeding on my ovary.

*plaster here & there*

ishouldbestudying

OKTHANXBAI.

Essay.

2011-06-24T00:26:00.002+08:00

17 hours of sleep, though I tweeted I wouldn't crash for long, but seriously I DID CRASHED for 17 hours straight! Post-Essay Exams Syndrome, yeah, sleepiness & weariness. *sigh*

Well, I didn't sleep before the Essay papers, so I had my revenge with those 17 hours. Heeee :D

Anyways, Essay exams was fine. Alhamdulillah, it crosses my mind to do the past year Qs & did some group-study with Ezzati, Bat & Ainal few hours before the exam start & some of the things that we discussed on came out. Ehem, is this a sign that I need to come out of those "anti-social" study concept, and start with the "study group" concept? Ehem, decision later.

Anyways, I still left abandoned one question, for the essay for since I totally blanked out & have no idea on that Q. Overall, everything was okay & it feeeeel much BETTER than the MCQ.

2 Down, 2 More to GO !

Now left with OSCE & Med Terms

HOYEAH!

Now, praying to God that I won't start getting distracted, though I actually can't wait to go for Alexandria right after exam! Meeting two nuts in Alexandria, Nado & Thirah. Heeee. I miss them.

P/S : Nak shopppppping after exam. Well, shop for souvenirs is in my priority lists :D

No Courage.

2011-06-22T02:17:00.003+08:00

I like to sing, and I want to sing.

On stage.

It's just I don't have courage to do so.

Bummer.

P/S : This is totally random. See what full 5 hours of Histology study can do to you.

Day 1, Exam Week : VIOLENT!

2011-06-21T05:42:00.003+08:00

It's boring to start with "Hello", so I'm starting the post this way.

Err, by this way, I mean, yeah.

*THIS WAY*

-Ignore this-

*roll eyes*

"
Violent adj.
1. using or involving violence
2. very intense, forceful, powerful.
"

In the next context, I would prefer the term "Violent" is used as the later meaning.

Intense & powerful, that would be how I describe the MCQ papers today. It was, violent.

It was intense until one girl fainted in the exam hall, it was way intense.

How powerful the MCQ paper was until, I had neck pain up until now & headache.

Good thing was, I survived.

Face it, it was hard, and all I could do was smile while doing them papers.

200 Qs, the first part mainly was about Anatomy of Upper Limb & Lower Limb, shucks. Then, on Immunology, HIV, Histology blah blah blah.

I've heard similar remarks of others saying the same thing, but now I already try my best on the MCQs, usaha sudah, tawakkal sahaja sekarang. Now let's just concentrate on the next paper, Essay paper which will be in 2 days, well if you minus the time to eat, sleep, clean etc. etc, I got less than 24 hours to prepare for esssay. Oooh, shucks.

......

P/S : ..though it was believed that the girl fainted has nothing to do with the paper being hard, but I like to believe it that way. Truth is, she's anemic & has Low B.Pressure though, that explains why she fainted.

P/S : ...the neck pain & headache? I tilt my head too much during the process & headache, I had no morning coffee, I forgot.

Still, MCQ was violent.

Lup Dap Lup Dap,

2011-06-20T06:02:00.004+08:00

Trying to distract myself a little bit here.

Let's talk about something else other than exams.

Heeeeee :D

Okay, let's seee.

I'm no hardcore movie watcher, I mean, I don't really watch movies.

I only watch them if let's say the television's on, and the movies on, I'll just watch it.

I WATCH IT, OKAY?

But, with less enthusiasm.

I don't really prefer movies that when you halfway watch them, and you can exactly tell the ending. I like movies where I can't even guess the plotline.

So, during the revision week, I don't know why I feel like watching this movie named, "Repo Men". I've heard of this movie from Nado end of January during the Egyptian Revolution, where we Malaysians had to undergo 24/7 curfew. So, no internet, the last thing resort was movies then. Nado mentioned saying this movie's pretty awesome and all, and I watched 2 minutes of it. Not that I think the early 2 minutes of the movie was bad or anything but, I DON'T EVEN KNOW why I didn't watched this movie earlier!

So, during the revision week, where the time I feel like procrastinating a little, I watched this movie. So, fucking aweeeeeesome weh!

The character of the "Repo Men" is wayyyy cool, I mean, repossessing the organs back *LIKE THAT?*, I think this movie is awesome. Yeah, also, what I like about this movie, the ending is unpredictable. HOYEAH.

I'm not gonna spoil every thing here, you gotta watch it on your own. Note to self, the movie is gory, bloody, gruesome, and just plain mean. Not "Sue Sylvester's mean", but inhumane mean. I gave Hanim to watch this and she couldn't finish watching them all. All in all, I still like this movie!

GO WATCH IT!

Hoyeah, Jude Law's British accent in this is soooooo *smack lips*.

P/S : I'm no good at movie-review. That's one thing I failed at besides memorizing the muscles of Upper Limb & Lower Limb. Kekekekeke.

P/S 2 : Exams in less than 12 hours. Ouch.

Perasaan Ini, Sigh.

2011-06-19T19:44:00.003+08:00

Nak rasa apa, dah tak tau dah.

Berdebar sebab rasa macam tak cukup study.
Sudah fully prepared ke aku?
Ingat ke tidak aku kepada benda-benda yang aku dah study semua ni, esok?
Soalan, kau jangan nak mengada-ngada susah.
BOLEH KE TAK AKU JAWAB ESOK?
Rasa nak nangis, UWAAAA ;___________;
Tak nak fail, please.
Aku masih lagi relax dan tenang, normalkah aku?
Tak sabar nak habis segala exam ni.
Soalan susah ke tak esok?
Markah 200 esok, hmm, boleh ke aku dapat more than 150 marks?
Ada orang nervous macam aku ke tak sekarang?
Kenapa ada certain soalan MCQ yang aku buat ni aku tak tau jawapan dia apaaaaa?
Esok exam pukul berapa eh?
Budak budak ni keep on asking questions on Examination Council, aku pun blur membacanya

HUWAAAAAA

;________________;

Hypnotize.

2011-06-19T08:23:00.004+08:00

I'm in my zen mode.

I'm still calm.

Oh zenn, zenn, zenn.

*Hypnotizing self*

P/S : Unlike Hanim here, who's having Physics paper tomorrow, she scribble on my forearm, arms, and even at my scapular region. She's going mental. Hahaha :D All the best tomorrow!

Fyeah, 2 Days To D-Day!

2011-06-18T06:34:00.007+08:00

18th June huh?

OHMAIGAHHHHH! 2 days to D-Day!

Alright, so last night we had a picnic at the Uni's stadium, or here, we called it "Istad Gamaah". This place is the 2nd place where Malaysian is most seen, beside the Faculty of Medicine.

I don't even know what's crack with Ecah & Musfirah's mind when they suddenly called up saying, "Jom, malam ni picnic kat Istad. Aku nak buat potluck". Well, if thinking of the things that I haven't finished revising yet, I would refused but then thinking that it might be a stress-reliever, I just go.

Hani & Ummul went back already, by this time :|

The people who came, Hani Jalil, Ummul, Anis Spartans, Hanis Zhafirah, Deeba, Nadia Roslan, Musfirah, Kyra, Syaza, Fatin, Aye, Hanim, Sue, Ecah, Aja & Fiza.

OH NOMS!

So, potluck. Ecah cooked Nasi Kerabu, OOOOOH NOMS YOU KNOW! Been a while haven't eat "REAL" made Terengganu specialty! Hafizah brought Spagetti, Aye brought donuts, Deeba, Spartans & Zhafirah brought this baked bread-sardine basket. And I brought fried chicken, piyak piyak!

Jemput makan,

We ate under the tree, while chatting, cracking up jokes. Though some of us are living in the same building, just one or two floor difference & living besides the other GMN's building, gah I feel like I haven't met any of them in a while! Everybody was busy with revision week & we hardly see each other! So, meeting up last night was awesome possum.

This is Hanim, and Aye. Say hello!

As usual, then we took pictures. Of course. FUN FUN FUN FUN!

Then, around 10-ish, balik rumah terus buka buku balik, dengan still bertudung sampai lah bila nak Subuh tu baru sedar still tak buka tudung lagi. Haha, need to topup balik masa yang dah digunakan untuk picnic earlier.

Anyways, 2 days to D-Day. Erm, how should I feel now eh?

I don't know why, but Alhamdulillah, I rather feel calm. Not like previous exams, 2 days before exams, dah cuak, nak menangis, dah rasa nak give up. Alhamdulillah, sekarang ni, perasaan tenang, it's just at times I feel I can't study anymore. But I take a break for a while, then continue back. I can't give up now.

Since it nearing exams, I manage to spend some of the time to buat solat hajat & stuff. Alhamdulillah, bila kita dekatkan diri dengan Allah S.W.T, diri rasa lah tenang.

Mintak-minta lah time exam ni nanti, tak blank. Minta-minta segala benda yang aku concentrate study, akan keluar, dan semoga aku boleh jawab dengan lancar. Dapat good result, Amin. Semoga Allah S.W.T bagi ganjaran yang setimpal dengan usaha aku. Amin.

Also, I've changed the place of my studies....AGAIN! Hahahaha :D Biasalah, meja study dah takda "ong", rasa malas lah nak study. Haha. So I've changed places again. Heheheeee.

Upper limb & Lower limb, haih tak tau nak cakap apa dah. Macam never-ending study pulak dua topic ni =='

Both Hanim & I are on revision week now. Since we're the only two are at home, so sometimes,w hen we feel bored or something, we don't even know what to do except, going to each other's room, stare at each other's face for 5 minutes, then leave the room. That's how boring we could get.

Even 5 minutes, before I publish this post, it was 2:15AM, and we feel like going out get some nice air outside. The only thing that' stopping us is, it's 2AM. Haiyo. Well, I actually don't mind going out at this hour for since I've gone out in the morning, lepak-ing at Ceasar or Sonesta with some friends, but since I can study now, why waste the time?

Anyways, I'm asking for your blessings, pray for me that I'll score high in this final exams, then insyaAllah, I'm looking forward for applying for scholarship. Amin. Pray for me, wish me luck!

Sadly, You're Alone In This.

2011-06-15T02:24:00.004+08:00

We're on our own.

Alone.

I Have A Date. You?

2011-06-14T06:04:00.004+08:00

TONIGHT, I HAVE A DATE

❤

We'll be having some coffee in dim-lighted room, uhuhh.

With some music in the background,

...& we'll be making babies as well.

BULLSHITTING CRAP, I D E K human could give birth to books these days!

P/S : Planning to finish Lower Limb by tonight, caffeinated!

I'm Looking Forward To Be Like Him, iAllah.

2011-06-13T19:37:00.005+08:00

Meet Abang Amin.

P/S : This is stalking-picture when we were having class before LOL

When I got here, I was told that he's one of the top Malaysian students here in Mansoura University. He also is one of the first batch students for Mansoura-Manchester Medical Programme. He's in his 5th year now.

What's my relationship with him? Hmm, Abang Amin organized class for 4th to 1st year students for Anatomy studies. He's my teacher, my tutor. He's teaching me Lower & Upper Limb.

Well, I don't even know why I'm posting about him now, but maybe I'm a little nervous for today for since he was planning to make revision class tonight for Lower & Upper Limb but, I haven't finish study. The thing is, Abang Amin sure know how to make people go nervous. Hahaha :D

As for me, I seriously can't be bombarded with attacking questions, then in one snap, I'll be looking daze & blur. Seriously, I can go blank when people attack me with question. Oh, complexity.

As my tutor, also, as a junior to him, I couldn't really express how I really respect him. Abang Amin tutor us good, and though sometimes I admit that we couldn't answer all his questions and looking all dumb all the time (..some of us, and especially me though =.='), well he never got mad or anything. Instead, he keep on giving us advices.

As usual, after listening them advices, All of us are quickly motivated, but then, POOF! Where did all those motivation go? Aiyo *facepalm*.

I seriously look forward to be like him, an excellent student in his studies, iAllah.

Abang Amin will be graduating next year, and it's a shame but we'll be the last batch to have him tutor us. *SOBS*.

iAllah, determination will get me through this. Go go go!

Yes, I Hate Study Week!

2011-06-13T02:01:00.005+08:00

Now, it's been 2 weeks & I'm on my study leave. In a week or so, I'll be going to faculty, with this super-fucked up nervous face, holding sheets of papers, going through the notes but not really getting what was written on them. One week, baby.

ONE WEEK.

When study leave first started, I was more determined. The schedules are up, everyday revising cases by cases, Upper Limbs, *scribble here & there*, just to remind self. That was good. I managed to achieve the target of the day. Finishing the studies for the day according to the schedule.

Recently, my schedule starts off with waking up early in the morning, earliest at 7AM, latest, 10AM. Then, I'll have my morning shower, grab a light/heavy breakfast. Coffee, glup glup glup. Then, take my supplement. Then I'll start studying. Well, it;s a lie if during the study course, I'm not distracted at all. There must be at least 15 times of moving over from the study desk, looking myself in the mirror, wash hands, dance to these Idols songs *SORRY SORRY SORRY SORRY*.

It must happen!

Cam-whoring is also included. Tsk Tsk Tsk.

Then, at 12:40PM, Zuhr's azan. By this time, I'll stop writing, then go around the house. Doing anything again. Half an hour after that, I'll go perform my prayers. Then, I continue studying again.

Unnnnnntil, Asar's azan. The same cycle like Zuhr azan again. Then, I'll continue study unnnntil the clock almost reached 5PM, by this time, I'll feel sleepy & tired. BUT, I won't sleep. I'll just sit on bed, looking at the ceiling or something. Blergh.

Then, by Maghhrib, I'll have my dinner then continue study again unnnnnntil around 2AM or 3AM. Subuh azan around 3:10AM, then I'll perform my Subuh prayers. After that, I'll sleep.

Can you lead a life like that everyday?

NOW, I'M LEADING SUCH LIFE!

Now, it has been 2 weeks, and I'm starting to get all distracted & bored. I hate myself when I started feeling like this. I always wonder where did all that motivation go?

Today, I feel so mad at myself for since I can't study well today. I feel so angry with myself til I feel like going over to H2, for their cats, and kill them. Hmm, irrational irrational. Those innocent cats. But then, suddenly after my Maghrib prayers, earlier today, I suddenly feel moved to recite the Quran. I don't even know why.

Yes, I admit. It has been long that I haven't recite the Quran. For so long. The last time was during my late Grandfather pass away. Praised to God, after reciting a few pages, I feel a lot more calmer. Indeed, the Quran is like an instant painkiller.

❤

Then, I changed my study place again. I moved my study desk to my room, & cleaned the space a little. Now, I feel a little more fresh, and maybe I could continue my study afterwards.

This place, right in front of the balcony has lost its Feng Shui. wachaaa!

Including this time, it's my 3rd time changing the place where I'm studying! I realized that I can't stay at the place for more than 5 days! I get bored, and the Feng Shui is off a little bit maaa.

So, I kept on making messes from places to places.

As for now, I'm hereeeee :O

The greatest temptation is, ze bed.

Be proud Dodo, I'm studying while looking at your face!

Hahaha :D

But the fact is study week is undeniably boring. Trust me, I'm the only one who thought so. Everyday I went to H1 each time I stucked up when I'm studying, and they also sometimes felt the same! Hahaha :D

Study week, is killing me. But, what kills me, it gets me stronger.

Like everytime I had study week, I can't wait for everything to end. Seriously.

NAOOOO, STUDY LAH GILEEEE!

Where 11 Days to D-Day, & I'm Here.

2011-06-09T16:18:00.004+08:00

"Last published post, "23rd may 2011".

Today, it's 9th June 2011. Hello hello! It's been weeks since my last update. Super busy with studies recently. My finals are approaching, in...exactly 11 days.

I'll be having my first paper on 20th June, MCQ. Then followed by Essay on 22nd, OSCE on 25th. and final paper, on 27th. Yeah, our exams are that way. As for conventional programme, their exams starts later, and ends around August. They are having exams according to subjects, but the gap of each examinations are around a week, or at least 5 days. While ours might seem "easy" or not-time-consuming, but it's hard enough since you have to study EVERYTHING! for a 2-hour exam. Hmm, not good not good.

Well, it will be over soon. 27th June, everything's going to end. I'm hoping for the best, and iAllah will try to score. No repeating papers!

After exams, maybe I'll go to Cairo & Alex back & forth . So many things to do. Aiyo.

Hit List :

Shopping for souvenirs
Shopping for new house
Move out of GMN's apartment and move in to new house
etc.

Most of my friends are going back to Malaysia on early July, even Hanim's going back on the 10th & Sue will be back on 15th. While I myself would have to stay behind a little longer for since I'll be going for holiday in London first before going back to Malaysia. Will head to London on the 21st, and will be back in Malaysia on 31st August! Merdeka, yo!

Okay, I'm excited for London, but now I'm more focus with the finals. Thank you, God for making me concentrate on exams. Kalau, tak dah banyak berangan dah. Hahaha :D

As for the finals, now I'm 40% prepared, Alhamdulillah. InsyaAllah by 18th I target that everything would be 100% prepared at least for MCQ. Pray for me, that I'll score, no failures.

No failures, no more repeating. Thank you.

Since it's exam fever here, wish you all the best, good luck, pray hard & score!

OHYEAH!

This little monster belongs to Serra. The name's, Jiji. & since the house is full with KPOP's fan, guess what the kitty's full name? HAHA.

Jiji Bin Jaejoong.

ROFL, seriously. HAHA :DD I love having this monster around! Shoo tiut! Slept with him few nights back, and he pooped! Oh, shmell. Hahha

Okay, tootles.

P/S : Anatomy studies are giving me a hard time. I can understand, it's just I can't seem to memorize them. Aiyo.

The Past Is No Future.

2011-05-23T01:17:00.000+08:00

I haven't write in a long time. I've somehow abandon the blog, I feel bad. All these while I've personafied the blog like it's humane enough, and abandon it like my slave it is. I feel bad. This post is Nado-inspired. Thank you darling.

Some event occurred an hour earlier before I'm typing this on, and it got me digging back my old posts on the blog. On count, I have 259 posts on this blog. I read from the beginning, the times where I started blogging.

Reading them, somehow I feel ashamed of myself. The writings were immature, and self-embarrassment. I wrote nonsense, even now. Truth is, I feel like deleting all those old posts, or starting anew.

Then, I realized something. But that's my evolution phase. That's the past. I shouldn't bother with it. The past is the past. The past, is what I am today. The past, is constant. Ones should not interfere the past. The past were sweet nor bitter. It's the way how the past works.

I don't feel regret making mistakes from the past, I learn from it. I don't feel regret saying all those nonsense, because I WAS a nonsense. Not anymore.

Move on, because the past is the present. There will be no present if there's no past. The past is for us to look back, seeing how much we have evolute to what we are now.

Cheers to the past!

Cats Know About Their Death, But Us?

2011-04-12T07:46:00.005+08:00

Mansoura has a lot of stray cats. Surprisingly, none of them stray cats are friendly. Being the typical coward & isolated cat, it makes them different from the stray cats in Malaysia. However, I went to Cairo and the cats there are friendly and not coward-ish like Mansourian cats. Maybe, Mansourian cats are that "unique".

Cats, I love. But seeing Mansourian cats who kept running away like, *WHOOSH!* when humans approach them make me annoyed. However, this one particular day, there's this one cat laid in front of our building's front gate. Well, I kept on meow-ing and call it but it just stayed there, idly. I recognized that cat for being my street's stray cat, always run when people approach him. But that day, it didn't do anything.

Sue, being the cat expert said that maybe that cat is nearing its death. She said, a cat knows when it will die. So, they'll stay at one place, keeping themselves idle until they die. So, then I could see people from apartment 2 who were the only one owning cats at their place, gave food to that stray cat. The next morning, I went to class and the cat was still there. When, I got back. the cat was gone from the building's front gate but then I found him laying on the empty lot ground under the hot sun.

I thought it was already dead, and maybe some people moved it to the empty lot. It turn outs that it was still breathing, but the cat let out this heavy breath. Still breathing, but heavy deep breath.

That evening, I went out and saw that the cat was gone from the empty lot, and it was almost raining. Right then, I could see something further away from my building, and it was in the middle of the road. It was almost raining, and the cat was sitting in the middle of the road. There was this Arab kids trying to shooshed the cat away by trying to kick a ball at it. While there was this bigger boy trying to scare and shoosh the cat by trying to ran it into his bicycle. Well, I scolded them (..in English obviously, but they just laughed at me. Tunggu kau, aku belajar bahasa mencarut dalam bahasa kau nanti). Then, it started raining, and I just had to leave.

The next morning, the street cleaner (..the worker who are in charge of cleaning the whole street) said that the cat died, and they discovered that earlier that morning.

My point in writing this is, a cat knows when it will die. So, they find a place where they sit idly and I don't know, maybe having a lot of flash backs during his life as a cat, or mesmerizing on how many female cats he had screwed whatsoever. While we human? Though we have something special that makes us distinctive than the cats which is owning "intelligence", we, don;t know when we will leave the world, or in other words, DIE.

Only God knows. So, take this as a time for us to worship Allah S.W.T, try to perfect our deeds to Him, perform our responsibilities to Him as we don't really now when we will come back to Him. No, I'm not perfect to say such things but I myself, are trying to be the better person, insya-Allah.

I'm A Dreamer. Shucks.

2011-04-04T22:54:00.011+08:00

Call me imaginative, I don't care.

For the past few weeks, it took time for me to adjust actually. Coming back to Egypt, I thought I was ready for it. Well, for since I kept on telling that I was born ready. It turns out that I wasn't prepared 100% mentally to come back. Those past few weeks, though it actually was hard for me to admit this, I was homesick.

I didn't actually thought of home or whatsoever. I don't feel adjusted with the new class timetable, and I returned back to my surrounding where people tend to be ignorant about others. Not that I was in need for attention though. But I feel unnecessary competitiveness that bugged me quite well until I can't really concentrate with studying.

I didn't thought of Ma, Ayah & home that much. But all of sudden BAMP! It ticks deep in my heart thinking of them, and I bursted out in tears. Took me one day to sort myself out. Like usual, none of the housemates knew. They still thought I was jet-lagged. Tsk, one week jet-lagged? Hahahaha.

Anyway anyhow, things are better now. I could say my homesick was dued to the PMS I was having. Hahaha.

ALRIGHT, THAT WAS NOT THE POINT I POSTED THIS!

These few days, I've dazed out a lot. Day-dreaming, imagining things. I don't even know why. I even day-dreamed in class. Like for example, I was day-dreaming earlier this afternoon that suddenly, my back hurts, and.......

*I'll write this in a story form to tell you how bad my day-dreaming is. LOL *

................................................

*monologue*

"I was actually wondering why this Doctor here had to explain on how many nerve supply are there at this scapular region with such difficulty? Can he just tell us some acronym for the nerve supply?"

All of sudden, I feel this deep aching sensation at my back. I give this painful look to Kyra & Fatin, and they mouthed out motioning to me with "Why?" quietly. I squirmed like those wriggly worms, still feeling those pain at my shoulder blade. At this point, the doctor noticed, and the class went silent. I, for once couldn't stand the pain, I dragged my bags out of the class, and still holding on to the pain, and trying not to scream out loud due to the pain.

I ran, ran and ran. I was sweating profusely, my lower limb was sending impulse to my system center telling me that I'm tired, but I kept on running. I ran home, where I believe there would nobody would be home. The pain was unbearable until when I was climbing up the stairs, I was screaming in pain.

As I reached on my door steps, I randomly searched the bag for the key, and opened the door clumsily. I went to my bed, laying on the bed, chest still heavy breathing, trying to compensate for the lost oxygen. I feel the heat, felling the urge to strip down. As I was doing so, I could feel the back pain was extremely unbearable. I dragged my feet to the toilet, standing in front of the mirror, stark naked, seeing a bulge at the back of my shoulder blade. Give it a little touch, a little pressure, I feel the pain.

As then, everything went black, and I didn't even know what had happened.

*******

Waking up, I can see that I'm not at my usual house. The house where Fatin, Sue, Hanim & I were sharing. Instead, I was on someone else's bed. Laying on my right side. The room was small, and it looks tidy but there are stacks of files on the table right across the room, laptops were switched on. Again, I thought I was dreaming or sort. Then, I tried to lay on my back and feel the same sensation I felt when I was dreaming in my dream. Wait, was it a dream?

I gave a quick touch and I could feel something like a bulge. Right then, I realized, it was not a dream. I could see some protruding sharp object attached to my shoulder blade. Panicked, I started rubbing my back, just to feel it, or maybe tried to atleast make myself believe that this is reality.

Right then, I heard a voice behind my back, "Finally, the moment has come. You're growing your own sets of wings. We've been waiting for this. It will takes months to finally develop, until then. you'll be under our care".

"WINGS? What wings? What is she talking about? Wait, who is she?", I monologued. Right then, the female in front of me, lead me somewhere. I take a look at her, she has this androgynous hair cut, __________________ (bla bla, no need to elaborate this part, since I can't recalled much).

The place is not familiar to me, though yet I know I'm still in Egypt. The surroundings are just not familiar. The place was too cool to be in Mansoura, because the place looks some well-equipped as in the place is full of tech-ish machine, gadgets and the people are (..Arabs, still) but they are speaking in English and KNHBKUGVKGTUCK the place is not like what Mansoura was.

The female in front of me, then stopped in front of one automatic sliding door, too much of a mystery she is, the identification verifier machine did not tell out her names, and I still wondered what was her name. As the door open, I could see there are few personnels inside the room, wearing somewhat weird clothes. Well, it's not that weird as he was wearing casual jeans, and shirt but what makes it weird was, he was wearing something like a poncho. Why would he wear a poncho anyways?

He looked up at the female that brought me to that room, and said, "So, finally huh?". I frowned. What do they actually mean by "Finally?". And seriously what wings?

"Hi, nice to finally meet you. I'm ____________". *insert any names, whatever*.
"What am I doing here actually?", I asked. "..and what wings? I'm confused."

"Ohhh, she still don't know anything, ____________?", the male questioned the female beside me. She in return, smiled sheepishly said, "I don't think so".

All of sudden, the male took off his poncho-or-whatever-I-don't-know-what-that-is, and something surprised me. He has...wings. Like bloody fucking wings. WINGS, the one birds use how to fly, except, BIGGER! I'm in awe, and surprised, and it freaked me out, I think I knees went jelly.

Something similar to this

The female dragged a chair and motioned me to sit, and she said, "Get it? You're growing your own set of those thing. Wings".

............................................................

Okay, yes. Then the lecturer interrupted with knocking his marker pen on the white board, tried to ask this one girl in the session to wake up from her sleeping. My day-dreaming, ENDS!

I don't even know why, how or why I even day-dreamed like that. Well, I wrote this because I think it was normal. But then, Fatin asked, "Kau berangan apa dalam kelas tadi? Aku berangan nak makan, aku lapar". Then, I told her about my day-dreamed as above, she went O.O . She looked me in deep confusion asking, "why?".

Well, this winged day-dreams occurred to me few times before. This was not the first time. I once day dreamed that while I was in the boring lecture hall, someone barged in and say he needed me to save the world. Then, I save the world.

Or or or, I once dreamed that one of my colleague is a vampire. He then, confessed to me saying that he's a vampire.

Also, I day dreamed that my housemates are secret agents. They are here with me to protect me from bad guys, when I then found out that I'm a secret heir to whatever CEO or bla bla.

And ohh ohhh ohhh, somehow, I always day-dreamed that I'm taking Medicine, in Egypt for a reason. Like, maybe I'm learning Medicine here, for a reason like maybe I would become a private doctors for mutants.

Okay, I'm dreamy, & tends to be highly imaginative in class.

/facepalm

Should I blame the reading materials I've read? Because I've read fics on Super Junior having wings, and I day-dreamed such. Here for the awesome fic --> GRAVITY. I read this long time ago, but I still keep on dreaming of this. Maybe, I should stop reading fictions. Maybe I should.

BUT FICTIONS ARE MY FAVOURITEEEE!

Asked Sue & Fatin on this, like had they ever dreamed of such things, they went, "Kau seorang je yang berangan macam ni". Okay, I'm no freak but like seriously you guys never dreamt of such stuff?

Gahh, I don't even know how to conclude this, *sigh*.

I'm dreamy. I should stop
Fics have their side effects. Good, it keeps my imaginary side alive. Bad, I go beyond imagination.
I won't stop ficcing.

DONE!

P/S : Well, this reading makes my heart sink a little bit. I can't grow wings lahh :(

P/S 2 : WHY I EVEN WANT WINGS ANYWAY? GAHH I'm going crazy.

OBBA, CHEER UP!

2011-04-04T22:31:00.005+08:00

Just read Obba's depressing post. Sorry for not being able to read them earlier. Like usual, I'm not here 24/7. You can just buzz me on Twitter, Obba!

Also, now cheer up okayyy? If there's anything you can just call me. I'm always hereeeee! I understand, sometimes you need somebody different to talk to. Like different problem, different people. I get that. You can just call. I'm always here.

I agree, though you have close friends at your place where you can tell your problem about it, sometimes you might turn for someone else. Been there, done that. And sometimes, you get my calls when I rant. Thanks for listening anyways :)

Nowwww, cheer up OBBBBBBA!

P/S : Yelahh, kalau kau kedekut sangat nak guna credit kau, miscall lah aku. Aku call kau. Hisyy.